I thought of an illustration that I would like to share, in relation to the FB stalking thread that I shared. This is particularly as it relates to those who are trying to rebuild, whether your SO knows, or not.

Imagine that you are standing facing forward, and on your right is your SO and your real life. On the left is the fantasy world, the A, your AP. As you are facing forward, you can see both sides with your peripheral vision. One issue is which side you are standing closer too. If you are trying to rebuild and dedicated to that, you would be closer to the right, etc... Another issue, though, no matter which side you are standing closer to, is which way you turn your head. I may be standing closer to my H, but if I think a lot about all that was relate to the A and about the AP or go online "stalking", I am turning my head to the left and my H is lost to my peripheral vision. I have been able to feel that to a degree, when I have gone too much in my head to the left.

So if you have chosen, and you are trying to rebuild, keep turning to the right. Try very hard not to turn to the left. The more you turn to the right and the less you turn to the left the faster you will progress. In fact, while you are at it, why don't you just shuffle a few more feet to the right and then just tuuuurn yourself that direction. Ahhh, that's better isn't it? The left is lost to your peripheral vision. At least for now. Yeah, you still know it's there, but you're not looking. And if you slip up and turn back? Just turn back the right way again. The more you practice, the better it gets.