Cheaters Anonymous Community Group
This is a support group for cheating spouses looking for understanding and strength. Betrayed spouses are welcome to post ONLY if they can do so in a supportive manner (no bashing...these posts will be deleted), and please do not comment on 'Cheaters Only' posts.
Just wondering the role that alcohol has played in your lives as your were in the midst of the A.
Now that I am 7 days NC (mornings are fine (true clarity), but as I get tired in the afternoon I begin to long for contact with OW), I look back on the last two years and realize the extent to which I have abused alcohol.
I don't mean going out drinking with the OW or OM (although OW and I would drink together often enough). I mean at other times, perhaps even alone. For me it was a way of handling the duplicity in my life. Making myself numb to the guilt that was there (to date, W does not know). It is not as through I have been getting drunk all the time. Instead, I have just enough drinks almost every night to be buzzed (numb) instead of "drunk". It was the only way I could really sleep at night. Fight with the OW (get buzzed); fight with the W (get buzzed). Fool around with the OW then stop and have a drink so as to come home buzzed.
Thankfully, for the first time in a long time, I do not want to get buzzed.
Now that I am 7 days NC (mornings are fine (true clarity), but as I get tired in the afternoon I begin to long for contact with OW), I look back on the last two years and realize the extent to which I have abused alcohol.
I don't mean going out drinking with the OW or OM (although OW and I would drink together often enough). I mean at other times, perhaps even alone. For me it was a way of handling the duplicity in my life. Making myself numb to the guilt that was there (to date, W does not know). It is not as through I have been getting drunk all the time. Instead, I have just enough drinks almost every night to be buzzed (numb) instead of "drunk". It was the only way I could really sleep at night. Fight with the OW (get buzzed); fight with the W (get buzzed). Fool around with the OW then stop and have a drink so as to come home buzzed.
Thankfully, for the first time in a long time, I do not want to get buzzed.
I wasn't really a drinker outside my A. Once I came to a small dinner party after a rendezvous and was clearly coming down from being drunk and I'll never forget my H's dear sister questioning what was wrong with me.
I'm glad you made me actually remember that time.....hadn't thought about it in years, just made me roll my eyes and smh.