Cheaters Anonymous Community Group

This is a support group for cheating spouses looking for understanding and strength. Betrayed spouses are welcome to post ONLY if they can do so in a supportive manner (no bashing...these posts will be deleted), and please do not comment on 'Cheaters Only' posts.

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sublime76 02/19/2013

Its been 3 weeks since I had last contact with the OW since DDay #2. (Same OW both times) Its been really tough, I still think of her constantly, almost obsessively. Its hard to believe that this woman I was and still am in love with for the last two years, is no longer in my life. Its a daily struggle not to call or attempt to communicate with her. I wonder if she has moved on or not and wonder if she still loves me. This is by far the worst thing I have ever been through emotionally next to losing my father. It does not seem like it is getting any better.

deleted_user 02/19/2013

I am sorry you are in pain and hugs to you.
I have to shout Wow! Three weeks! Great job! I am sure it has been hard but you have made it so far.

Sparkie119 02/19/2013

I commented on your last post and was thinking about you :)...I cried when I read your story. I wasn"t strong enough to leave OM because I love him and I stayed with my family cause my son needs me. I'm stuck between these two worlds.

Do you feel ANY connection to your wife? How about your relationship with uour choldren. Maybe by focusing on becoming an even BETTER father can allow you to receive joy and love from other areas on your lifr while you struggle with this area.

deleted_user 02/19/2013

One day at a time. Sparkle is asking great questions.

Gabrielle48 02/19/2013

I just scanned through your last thread which turned out to be really long, lots of responses. I think I put 3 responses on that thread. go back and reread it to refresh all the good advice you got in that thread. I know it hurts so bad, and the vacuum pull from it is so hard to feel. It gets better so very slowly and you can speed it up only a little if you work at it.

deleted_user 02/19/2013

You're strong. You're motivated. You can do this. It will be hard, but when has that ever stopped you from accomplishing something?

redlegs 02/19/2013

It took some time but I eventually realized that the OM was just someone who happened to be around at the right time (or the wrong time depending on how you look at it) when I needed someone. He could have been anyone. The problem was with my marriage and he helped me to forget those problems. Now that he is gone, I have had to face the problems and I am happy to say, things are getting better. He turned out to be a major liar and user. This may not be true in every case, but I can feel fairly secure telling you that soon you will see the OW for what she is, and that is someone who is filling a need for you. Once you put some distance between you and that relationship, you should be able to see it for what it was. I am sorry you are dealing with this loss, and it is a loss. It will get better if you want to move forward with your life.

Good luck.

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