So I guess this is as good a place as any to get some honest opinions. So I (the wife) am the cheating spouse. Though he has cheated as well, i'll get to that. So we got together young, 15, high school sweethearts. Over the course of our almost 15 years together, I have cheated w/ 28 other guys, though I don't count 8 of them because we were in an "open relationship" when those happened, but since he couldn't do it himself, he counts them towards me. He's only cheated on me twice that I know of, but fooled around plenty, so he's no saint. Yes, i know, we got together too young, should have done our own thing but its all in the past now, its the present issue i'm dealing with. About 8 months ago, he got into motorcycles. He's always liked them, but we finally got to a point we could get him one and he loves it. a few months later, he starts to want to join a motorcycle club. ok. no big deal. till i start hanging out with them too. I see what they do when i'm around, makes me wonder what they do when i'm not. the men there cheat on their wives, stay out all hours of the night (till morning light and that's early). So a few months into that, he tells me he wants to do another open relationship, i'm bi, so we can both do other girls (no men at all) and to come up with rules (which is why he counts the ones from the first time we tried, we didn't set rules). So i came up with 10, and I don't think they are that bad. basically, not in our house, not in public (they aren't bf/gf, its just sex) always use protection, she can't ride on his bike with him, that's my seat, he can't spend money on her cept for condoms, if feelings arise, it stops, our time is our time, he can't talk to her when he's with me, and a couple more i can't think of at the moment, but he can't follow them. He has an issue with each one. He's like what if i get fixed and she's on birth control? i'm like there is still diseases, hes like well what if i get drunk and forget? i'm like then we aren't having sex till you have been tested for 6 months.... he has an issue with money and public, he thinks he shoudl be able to go to lunch, breakfast, movies, whatever and buy her things, i'm like no, you don't even do that for me. but yeah he has issues with all of them. and he's broken a few already, he talks to other girls while we're together and he's spent money on another girl. so i'm like wtf? i feel cause i cheated on him so much, i owe it to him to let him do this but i can't stand how he is now. he's changed. he's such an ass now, hes acting like the guys at the club, going to strip clubs not calling me staying out all night, just like a bachelor but his wife and 6 yr old son are home with out him. he works nights, so i look forward to his days off so we can spend time together, but on his days off he's always out with the club. i guess what i'm trying to get at is, should i let him do this so he can "get back at me" (even though he says he's not doing it cause of my past cheating, i've asked him multiple times to stop yet he continues, so what else woudl it be?) do i not have a say in anything in our relationship because i cheated? idk what to do. i feel like i'm going to lose my husband. our fighting has gotten alot more frequent and so much worse. you can read my past couple journals to get some more insight. sorry im kinda all over the place. i just don't know what to do. opinions are great, give me some outsider insight, just no bashing please. we're all here for the same reasons.