It's not great that were bullied through your school years, I can really relate to that one. But what is positive is that you don't allow possible learnt behaviour contiue through you. Sadly I have not been that strong and have on sorten times allowed the bullying monster rise up and now my relationship is sufering real badly..... its crazy. Why do unto others that you couldn't stand having done to you. Even though I sometimes try to make it ok becuase I'm not physicaly violent I am verbaly agressive....Big shame on me

aki46ish, my heart bleeds for you it really does. You are also worthy of compassion even though you have done what you have done. There can be no greater sadness than hurting the people you truly love in life through your own action.

You need to accept yourself, not the agressive part but the part of you that was hurt and is crying both for what happened to you in the past and what you are seeing now in the way you are effectively destroying the life that you try to build yourself.

You need to understand where the agressive behaviour comes from and at the same time connect to the part of you that is hurting in order that you understand that this aggressive behaviour MUST COME TO AN END.

You have to sit down with your wife and explain all that happened to you and not be afraid to let the tears come flooding out.

Just reach out to me if you need me, if I am getting through to you here.

This is why my avatar is a broken heart.

Maybe a bit late here, but here I am, first to a helping hand its fantastic your here and I hope that you may help others understand that maybe there can be some light at what can often be a very long tunnel.

As for aki46ish, good for you to come and share to, I sincerely hope its your first step to getting the serious help that you need to, yes when were bullied it can go either way, we can become protectors or like you you the attacker, be it physical or verbal it still hurts, but physivcal scars go away quickly mental scars do not, so verbal abuse can often go far much deeper than physical ones. get some help for you, you never liked it why should someone else now suffer because you are not able to handle your own issues, stoping hurting someone can only make you love you more, give it a try

SimonM - I can but agree with you

I promise to be around for a while now so if you guys fancy sharing lets do it