just to add... i do believe that God was there, weeping with me. i believe that God is my everything. have thought about this a lot...my conclusion, that it was so traumatic,i could not feel anything, only wanted to survive.the fact that i couldnt feel God there, doesnt mean that he wasnt there. i suppose this is where faith comes in.any comments would be appreciated:-)

It's hard to deal with trauma and understand why God would 'let' this happen.
Sin is in this world...and I look at it as the people that did this to us are evil, sinful people.
God was there...and sin was there too. But, God is still here to help us through the healing.
There is Hope in Healing! Have you looked into any Women's Bible Studies at your Church or a local Church? I have found a lot of healing doing those studies, esp ones by Beth Moore!

thanks for the advice.i have looked into it...my problem is time.i am a final year medical student in south africa and we work extremely long and irregular hours...have never been able to join one and be able to go on a regular basis.but will look into it again.thanks

Hi m5555,

I'm so sorry for what you experienced and I thank you for sharing your thoughts. I have the exact same question. I believe in God ... but when I re-experience the trauma from my childhood I can't see him anywhere in the "picture." I've had someone tell me that he was there, keeping me alive, but at times I wish I'd died. I guess all of our answers will be revealed in time ... that's the best I can hope for.

I hope you find the answer and peace you are seeking. I wish I could provide you with more comfort. I'm sorry.

((HUGS))

thanks for your comment.i have had such a breakthrough...i have been praying with friends and asking God to reveal himself to me in that situation.God has been so faithful...he has given me a pìcture of him being there when the assault happened.he almost spiritually transported me to a different place.i was sitting in the most beautiful field.sitting with jesus.He was there, carrying me through it all! i hope this is encouraging.God is good all the time and all the time he is good.his timing is perfect! its still hard but at least there is a safe place that i can go to.i pray for a breakthrough in your life.hugs

I have to wonder where God was also, my grand daughter drowned at a nearby lake while we were having a birthday party for her brother. With 25 of us there how did it happen that no one saw her go under the water? I know God loves us all, I know He knows every detail before it happens, but I have a hard time with this. Why would he take a very sweet , much loved 3 year old home? I have to wait for my answers. I am now working hard on trusting God. I keep looking for more scriptures on trust, and end up going to Job 38, He is in charge, He knows what we are all going through. Sometimes I feel like I trust Him with my life, but not my tired beat up broken heart.

I'm so sorry to hear about your granddaughter...that's tragic. That is something that is hard to deal with. God is still there for you...broken heart and all...one day you'll meet up w/ your beautiful granddaughter again. ((Hugs))

I am so very sorry to hear about both of your experiences! I know that God cares about every single detail of your lifes! Jesus came to heal the broken hearted! And He is CLOSE to the broken hearted! A lot of real bad things happen to people! Me and my hubby have went through a lot of messed up experiences as kids also! I wish things like that never happen! One things for sure, there will be no suffering in heaven! Thank God for that! My heart goes out to you both!

Prayer: Lord I pray for these women, I ask you to heal their hearts and minds! I thank you Lord for giving them peace over their past! Set them free in their emotions! Meet all their needs according to Your riches in Glory in Christ Jesus! Thank you Lord that no weapon formed against them will prosper and every tongue that rises against them be shown to be wrong! I thank you Lord for doing a new thing in these women's life! Thank you Lord for healing these women, in Jesus name amen!

Thank you, Blackbelt for that beautiful prayer.

I also am really struggling with where God was when I was abused from a very young age and for many years. I don't trust Him because He didn't help me even though I cried out to Him. He may have felt bad for me, but that did me no good.

Yea, I wanna know why God?