I was diagnosed with BPD a month ago. My ex boyfriend ended things nine months ago. I met up with him for " booty calls" 3 times last time in September and feel like I've been dumped again. He lied during the relationship and even visited with an ex during our relationship. He is a " well functioning " alcoholic. I know he is not right for me long term but I'm still struggling to stop putting him on a pedestal , obsessively thinking of him and longing for him. I just want to stop