BDSM Support Community Group

A group for those in D/s relationships, whether 24/7 or strictly casual. Also welcome are those not in relationships but craving that type of intimacy.

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What do I do?

Chelle44
Chelle44

I was taught to be a submissive to my ex of 8 yrs. During this time he had 5 other females. After 2 years he ask me to marry him and we moved in together.  He started being very mentally and physically abusive. We split but kept having meetings to have sex. During those times he was all in to me but as soon as i left it is always him telling me he don't need me or want me. He dont answer my phone calls and it takes him days to answer my text. I tell him ive moved on but i can't mentally. He tells me he still owns me until the day I die. Please any help

helppls21
helppls21
I'm 15 so I don't really have much experience in this. But I honestly think that you should leave if you are in a situation where you can leave the relationship. Sex isn't worth getting abused, and this puts you in an unhealthy relationship with someone. From your profile pic, I can tell that you are very beautiful, and you deserve so much better. I know its been like a year since you posted this. I am sorry no one replied at the time you wrote it. If the post still applies to your current situation (which I hope you are better off than you were then), then all I really have to say is, find you a mans (or woman) who loves and respects you and treats you like the queen you are, someone who doesn't put you down or cause you to feel like this. I wish you the best of luck in your life. <3
moonshadow
moonshadow
I am 72 years old and I am a switch. Here is something I have learned over the years that may help you define your view of yourself.

The dominant is never in charge. The submissive holds all of the power and you should understand this about yourself. You own yourself. There is nothing wrong with submitting to a master for the spiritual adventure and connection, but you are always your own person. If being submissive is something your bones ache for, take your time and find a master that loves and respects you, as well as enjoys dominating you during sex.

Be choosy about who you allow yourself to be collared to. There are millions of people out there who would treat you lovingly yet would be happy to dominate you with a measure of respect. If you cannot respect your Dom, he isn't a Dom. He is an abuser.