BDSM Support Community Group

A group for those in D/s relationships, whether 24/7 or strictly casual. Also welcome are those not in relationships but craving that type of intimacy.

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First Time Slave with MANY Questions

Atalanta
Atalanta

Hi All,


I’ve never been involved in BDSM before, but I’ve always known I wanted to be a part of the lifestyle so I joined an app and spent a long time talking to people to find the right Dom. Anyway, I ended up clicking with a Master instead and after meeting him in person and after hour upon hour of delightful phone conversations, I agreed to be his slave. We haven’t gotten physical yet and I’m insanely nervous because I don’t know what is expected of me... Can anyone give me some idea?


Also, I don’t feel like I’m doing enough for him in general. Is it normal to feel like this, or could it be that he’s not asking for enough or that I’m simply too new to the lifestyle to know? Thanks!

KinkGarbageVanillaTreasure
KinkGarbageVanillaTreasure
Well before you begin ANY type of kinkster arrangement, you must carefully negotiate any terms of the relationship. You have limits, he has limits. There are terms in place to keep you safe spiritually, psychologically, emotionally, and physically. The same with him. So this should be in place and this conversation had BEFORE any type of BDSM activity takes place.

If you are currently serving him, but get no feedback all, or only negative feedback, but never told what you do right, then I would say pershaps you should take a break from the relationship. Also if this man began "doing things' without first negotiating anything, then perhaps this is not the safest most responsible person. You deserve a responsible patient person who first recognizes you as a human being. Slave/sub after all is a secondary role to this. It is some part of who you are, but not the whole defination of who you are. Are there any groups of kinksters in your area? Are there dungeons where people scene? You deserve a safe and good experience ok. Feel free to ask any other questions.