Hi Lozey-

I've had a similar experience with my (now ex-) girlfriend, and other women prior. I've looked back often, thinking that all must be off. Now, I can see how I have been anxious in so many ways to not be attractive, in words and actions, not only in relationships, but also with friends. It feels better to not blame others and not blame myself for having attachment anxiety-avoidance disorder. This is not our fault, our choice or our ploy to feel worried. It is common and is something we can take care of for our health--with yoga, healthy diets, and awareness. Hope you find comfort for your needs.

I just joined and just saw this post. I could not feel more like you...I feel the same way about my husband. It’s difficult to manage and I wonder if we are right for each other in the end. He’s actually avoidant attachment! What’s your husband? I don’t know if you need someone to correspond with but it would certainly help me. I couldn’t have described the feeling better than you have ans it’s so hard to deal with because no one really understands and since it’s not some imminent problem or tangible issue I feel like my husband minimizes it and it further Spurs my loneliness. I’d like to find like minded people going through a similar situations than don’t get bored of talking about it... it’s so hard to try to work on myself and my family issues and my marriage without the proper non judgmental support (and there’s only so much you can put on your therapies!) so if you are interested in chatting here or emails, please let me know. Maybe it will help you too to share!

I can relate to this perfectly with how I would describe my relationship with my partner. He is an obvious anxious-avoidant and has always struggled with vulnerability, affection and empathy.
I find myself feeling anxious about my “neediness” pushing him away (even though i do my best to be aware and mindful).

I am unsure how to stop feeling like this in my relationship or is this something I will feel always?