ignore typos. i tend to do that a lot.

I agree with you. I hate that I like the feeling but I do. I like the bones showing. I like the empty feeling in my stomach. And I know it's so awful but I like it and am having a hard time coming to terms with the fact that I need to stop doing this to myself. But as much as it sucks, I'm glad to see there's someone out there thinking the same things as me. *hugs*

Well... I do appreciate the honesty. I like it too. Even if I know with my eyes that I don't look exactly sexy. I like the bones...it's holding me back from surrendering to my meal plans...recovery.

Sorry, but I have seen the suffering of someone with anorexia, and family members. Worse, she continually blamed other things for her multiple serious health problems and had a variety of doctors who'd ply her up with drugs. A good internist laid it out, if you don't eat you may die and I will recommend a feeding tube to keep you alive.

I am not underestimating the suffering of people or the challenges in life, I can just say someone go through anorexia and bulimia is heart-breaking and there's nothing good about it, something like seeing a woman with an abusive boyfriend and her bruises and having her defend him.

Of course we like it, that's the reason it's a huge problem for us. In fact that is the problem. It's just that unless someone has or had it they don't understand the attraction at all, because logically it's horrible, but emotionally we feel successful.

Well if you logically know its wrong, can't you try to work to let the logical side of you control the other.

There are successes. We have a family member with anorexia and likely Munchausen's Syndrome. She would not eat or purged and said she had various illnesses, going to various doctors who would cater to her and say how serious her condition was, and bill the insurance company. She was at the point of being placed on a feeding tube when a good doctor simply said she would die if she refused to eat.

Fast forward, some things worked out in her life, she decided to gain weight, someone actually made a pass at her in a bathing suit because she looked much better, still has some concerns but doing much, much better. Eating eliminated or at least reduced many of her health problems.