For the past few months I've been dating this amazing girl! For the most part I've never felt so loved, happy, and satisfied. We had our ups and downs but for the most part things seemed pretty incredible. We even talked about moving in together and kind of tried it over the past few weeks. It sure felt like things were going pretty well... except the last few days we were together.

According to her, she started to notice things about me that were getting on her nerves. I knew what she was talking about, I was even trying to change to the point where I actually brought it up and asked her what I could do to change. At the time she reassured me it was fine.. but apparently it wasn't.

Up until a few weeks ago we were both unemployed. I was basically living off my food stamps but I always had a lot of extra funds on my card so we were splitting it. I would restock her fridge when it was empty and buy her food when she felt she needed to get something else.

When I got my new job, I was even happier. Everything finally seemed to be falling into place. My ex and I even talked about moving in together and at my work trade there was actually a bigger house available. I asked if I could take over the open position and my gf at the time could move in but my boss at the work trade said no. After that things seemed to decline with my gf and I. She seemed to loose hope. I sort of ended up moving in with her but kept the work trade for a few weeks and although things seemed to work out really well, towards the end we both noticed things that needed changing.

She used to tell me I need to take care of her. I need to help her. I need to motivate her. She's broken up with me because she felt I wasn't contributing enough. Like everything I do was half-assed and it made her feel like crap instead of lifting her spirits. I don't know what's gotten into her because, although I might not have been doing the best job possible I felt was doing my best. She says the problem mainly is I don't know how to be in a relationship and she's not wrong. I've never had a girlfriend before. I've never lived with someone else before. I hate that she feels unappreciated because she's really not. I'm more than grateful that she gave me a nicer place to live, that for the most part she's been a pretty amazing girlfriend and that she had brought so much happiness to my life. I hate that I haven't been able to make her feel the same.

I don't know what to do from here. I recognize that I need to make some serious changes and I've told her I'm willing to do however much work it takes to keep and maintain this relationship. I need to grow as a person and so far this seems to be helping tremendously! However, she felt like I was just a dead weight on her shoulders instead.

It's hard to take this break up entirely seriously but it still has seriously disrupted my sleep and although I don't feel particularly depressed yet, I feel like it's only a matter of time until I sink back into it... which is kind of the root cause of many of my own personal issues already.

Don't get me wrong, I do recognize some of the things I was doing wrong and I've done a lot of things right but she wont even acknowledge what I've been doing right. She even denies it! I take responsibility for my own actions (or lack there of) and I am willing to change both for myself and for her to make things better but she doesn't feel like I can.

Right now, I've gotten like maybe an hour of sleep? Probably not even that. I don't even know what time it was when I woke up. I'm going to rant elsewhere but here at least, this is my update for whats going on. For those more experienced, is there anything I can do? It seems hopeless but with this girl I really don't know. She changes her mind about us quite a lot and this really does seem like something fixable but at least for the time being she's not willing to even try fixing this. She's used to dating rich men who take care of her, I'm basically one step away from being homeless and if not for my new job I'd be completely broke right now.