I am new to this group. I have been on another DS support group for quite sometime. I myself am married to an alcoholic and wish to get support for dealing with this disease. After trying to reconcille my marriage due to so many issues I had an ephiphany that all of his actions and my reactions were due to alcolism. I made all the excuses he did and was in much of the same denial. I decided yesterday after an ugly abusive situation that I have to leave him. He has worn me down and I have become completely broken. Why do I feel like the guilty party? I have been attending Alanon and reading every self help book from marriage & relationships to healing myself on my own. The situation has just gotten worse. I do not want to abandon him. I finally get the last part of the Serinity Prayer that says "the wisdom to know the difference" but yet I still want to help him and get him sober. I don't understand all of this detachment with love stuff. How do you really do that and why?