Adult survivors of child abuse Community Group
A group to help support and heal adult survivors of child abuse. Limited to those who want to change the cycle...not perpetuate it.
Good evening everyone,
My name is Christine but you can certainly call me Chrissie if you like! ^_^
I am currently in a Master's program at Capella University and on my final year of course work and then hopefully by next summer 2013 (crosses fingers) I should have my Master's Degree. So far the only family member on two very different family's to achieve such a feat! As I stated previously, I'm attending Capella University so I'm enrolled in a course about Group Therapy and one of our assignments is to attend a support group for the 10 weeks necessary and describe our experiences while in said support group. It had to be a group that interested the learner (me) as well as a group that had an influence on future professional career as an MFT (Marriage & Family Therapist).
So why am I here in this particular group...that's a long and bitter story.
My upbringing was a rocky patch, one of the first memories I can recall is getting a severe migraine in 3rd Grade and being sent home by the school...I was beaten for crying about the pain by my mother and then when my father came out my mother told him I had lied about being sick at school and was beaten, soaped, and made to go to bed with no dinner. It was the worst day in my life until the following year on December 23 came around. My mother was working at a restuarant and my brother was staying over a friends, I was home with my father and a bunch of his friends had come over. I was old enough to realize he was a drug dealer of marijuana and cocaine, I'd see the white powder on his night stand with a razor blade and one of my chores revolved around picking the buds off of his hydroponic marijuana forest growing in my parents bedroom. The smell was intoxicating, even to this day I swear if someone takes a hit off a joint, I can smell it from 100ft or more away!!
This evening was different from the rest in many ways, my father had told me to go to my room when his 'guests' had arrived and I quickly obeyed. A short while later a friend of the family entered my bedroom and asked me how I was doing. This escalated to light tickling and he grabbed me and began tickling me over his shoulder, I did not realize when I was roughly thrown down I had been transported to my parents bedroom. Startled and a little scared, I made to get up and leave and the door was slammed shut. I looked to my father who sat in a chair in the corner as he took a hit off his joint for instruction. He opened his eyes slowly, they were ice blue and red, it's still haunts me to this day.
"Ass and mouth only... no bruises unless I give them ...agreed?"
I'll spare with the other details, since I usually get in trouble for the vulgarity. My opinion is the truth hurts sometimes and sick shit like this happens everyday...wake up. Anyway this went on for a few years thankfully because the assaulters freaked when my menstrual cycle happened to show up during one of the sexual assaults. It was always with different men and lots of cash was being exchanged at the time. My husband and I have come to the conclusion my father was in heavy debt and was perhaps using me as a means of paying back these individuals or realized there was a market for underage sex with children...still wrong but whatever.
So as you can imagine, the interest in this topic is real as ever. If there were anything I wanted out of this group interaction...I think it would be ways in which everyone has coped. I have unfortunately become a emotional eater and over the last 10 years I've lost my 150lbs curvy frame has become a 230lb hourglass. I still struggle with flashbacks every now and again. They usually are triggered by certain words, scenes in a movie, or even at times during intimate moments in bed with my husband. The night terrors are the worst, I never remember what happens but always wake up frightened beyond comprehension and have on several occassions punched, kicked, scratched, and generally mauled my husband in my sleep (what a champ!) So I guess I would want to know if there was anyway I could curb these terrors other than tying myself up in rope before I sleep but that may sound a bit kinky.
I look forward to any interactions in the coming weeks ahead and good luck to everyone as the new year progresses!
Sincerely,
Chrissie C. a.k.a Siniah115
My name is Christine but you can certainly call me Chrissie if you like! ^_^
I am currently in a Master's program at Capella University and on my final year of course work and then hopefully by next summer 2013 (crosses fingers) I should have my Master's Degree. So far the only family member on two very different family's to achieve such a feat! As I stated previously, I'm attending Capella University so I'm enrolled in a course about Group Therapy and one of our assignments is to attend a support group for the 10 weeks necessary and describe our experiences while in said support group. It had to be a group that interested the learner (me) as well as a group that had an influence on future professional career as an MFT (Marriage & Family Therapist).
So why am I here in this particular group...that's a long and bitter story.
My upbringing was a rocky patch, one of the first memories I can recall is getting a severe migraine in 3rd Grade and being sent home by the school...I was beaten for crying about the pain by my mother and then when my father came out my mother told him I had lied about being sick at school and was beaten, soaped, and made to go to bed with no dinner. It was the worst day in my life until the following year on December 23 came around. My mother was working at a restuarant and my brother was staying over a friends, I was home with my father and a bunch of his friends had come over. I was old enough to realize he was a drug dealer of marijuana and cocaine, I'd see the white powder on his night stand with a razor blade and one of my chores revolved around picking the buds off of his hydroponic marijuana forest growing in my parents bedroom. The smell was intoxicating, even to this day I swear if someone takes a hit off a joint, I can smell it from 100ft or more away!!
This evening was different from the rest in many ways, my father had told me to go to my room when his 'guests' had arrived and I quickly obeyed. A short while later a friend of the family entered my bedroom and asked me how I was doing. This escalated to light tickling and he grabbed me and began tickling me over his shoulder, I did not realize when I was roughly thrown down I had been transported to my parents bedroom. Startled and a little scared, I made to get up and leave and the door was slammed shut. I looked to my father who sat in a chair in the corner as he took a hit off his joint for instruction. He opened his eyes slowly, they were ice blue and red, it's still haunts me to this day.
"Ass and mouth only... no bruises unless I give them ...agreed?"
I'll spare with the other details, since I usually get in trouble for the vulgarity. My opinion is the truth hurts sometimes and sick shit like this happens everyday...wake up. Anyway this went on for a few years thankfully because the assaulters freaked when my menstrual cycle happened to show up during one of the sexual assaults. It was always with different men and lots of cash was being exchanged at the time. My husband and I have come to the conclusion my father was in heavy debt and was perhaps using me as a means of paying back these individuals or realized there was a market for underage sex with children...still wrong but whatever.
So as you can imagine, the interest in this topic is real as ever. If there were anything I wanted out of this group interaction...I think it would be ways in which everyone has coped. I have unfortunately become a emotional eater and over the last 10 years I've lost my 150lbs curvy frame has become a 230lb hourglass. I still struggle with flashbacks every now and again. They usually are triggered by certain words, scenes in a movie, or even at times during intimate moments in bed with my husband. The night terrors are the worst, I never remember what happens but always wake up frightened beyond comprehension and have on several occassions punched, kicked, scratched, and generally mauled my husband in my sleep (what a champ!) So I guess I would want to know if there was anyway I could curb these terrors other than tying myself up in rope before I sleep but that may sound a bit kinky.
I look forward to any interactions in the coming weeks ahead and good luck to everyone as the new year progresses!
Sincerely,
Chrissie C. a.k.a Siniah115
Beaumont
I had migraines as a child too, and they continue to be a problem for me as an adult. I hope you have found treatment for them, as there are now several drugs that can be used to treat them. Imitrex is on medication, and it usually stops the pain within ten to twenty minutes.
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