Adult children of narcissistic parents Community Group
A space to explore our thoughts, feelings and experiences that have occurred as result of our childhoods with narcissistic parents (one or both). It is hoped that we can use this space as a further tool by which to take control of our lives from those we have inadvertantly relinquished it to, heal the hurt and be happy.
Hi, it's this one here (may jump to "I'm The Adult Child of A Narcissistic Parent...What Now?" for coping tips) http://www.bandbacktogether.com/adult-children-of-Narcissistic-parents-resources/
I joined this group weeks back after living with my N-parent again, following one of the instructions (connecting with other ACNP) from that article online. Living with her again to find out if there's sth I can do to make her life a bit easier... part of her anger probably due to the grieving process for my dad, who passed 7 years ago.
Would have saved lots of time and confusions if I had seen this article earlier. Several reminders, extracted below, truly speak to my heart as that's the part helped me a lot recover and rebuild myself.
- Acknowledge that you've never learned how to properly deal with feelings, and begin to start working through these feelings.
<This might cost a lot of energy, will, and time. It worked for me.>
- Work toward loving that little child inside you in the ways your Narcissistic Parent never did.
<One example for me was to refill my fondness of fluffy toys, which she always claims to be trash and waste of money.>
- Remind yourself every day that you need to take care of yourself - those needs for self-care are incredibly important.
<Took me several weeks and enormous courage to make a "Daily Routine Practice for Mental Health" list containing this reminder. Have reviewed the list first thing in the morning ever since. It brought me confidence and calm. I've also made a box as the mental first aid kit that I can rely on whenever running into inevitable triggers. It makes me feel secure and powerful.>
Hope this helps. =]
I joined this group weeks back after living with my N-parent again, following one of the instructions (connecting with other ACNP) from that article online. Living with her again to find out if there's sth I can do to make her life a bit easier... part of her anger probably due to the grieving process for my dad, who passed 7 years ago.
Would have saved lots of time and confusions if I had seen this article earlier. Several reminders, extracted below, truly speak to my heart as that's the part helped me a lot recover and rebuild myself.
- Acknowledge that you've never learned how to properly deal with feelings, and begin to start working through these feelings.
<This might cost a lot of energy, will, and time. It worked for me.>
- Work toward loving that little child inside you in the ways your Narcissistic Parent never did.
<One example for me was to refill my fondness of fluffy toys, which she always claims to be trash and waste of money.>
- Remind yourself every day that you need to take care of yourself - those needs for self-care are incredibly important.
<Took me several weeks and enormous courage to make a "Daily Routine Practice for Mental Health" list containing this reminder. Have reviewed the list first thing in the morning ever since. It brought me confidence and calm. I've also made a box as the mental first aid kit that I can rely on whenever running into inevitable triggers. It makes me feel secure and powerful.>
Hope this helps. =]
I love your ideas of self caring!!! I now have pictures of myself, along with my children and grandchildren on the walls. I never put myself down, and if old habits die hard and negative self talk creeps in I forgive and gently remind myself how far I have come!
Kindest regards and admiration to you and your sharing!!! Thanks again!
My mum has now passed away, and I have established boundaries, and now have measured contact with my dad.
Thanks for posting this x