A bit long this maybe, so here goes, my mother is 77 and I think she has ADHD, though she denies it and blames it on other outside forces, I have read lots of resources on the net and my mother fits most of the criteria, and some of the typical symptoms are making things really tough for me, I.E the impulsivity and the working memory not being able to keep up with her speed of thought, so she forgets a lot of things regularly mainly where she has put things, and the constant need to be doing stuff, her garden is still not finished and this is year 11 of her starting it, dozens of unfinished jobs, and walking off when I am trying to tell her something and forgetting that too, so my question is how can I get her to concentrate long enough, without her losing her temper and walking off, I amk still bedridden so following her is impossible, so in that even I have to send her a text message which can sometimes be 30 minutes or more before it is answered, and that is commonly a rushed answer with lots of wrong key presses making the answer illegible, so I send another message and she shouts at her phone, and she is downstairs...bottom line is my mother thinks she is far more able than she really is, and takes every negative comment  as a personal attack, I am sick to death of walking on eggshells,so how can I ask a question without irt turning into an argument, I just need a few basic things doing but NOT tidying up my room by moving stuff so I cant get at it, the main problem at the moment is a partially detached  toenail  that I dont want to become infected, so how do I do this, ask her to just listen and perform some simple tasks, 3 is the current limit of sequential things she can remember, or action before breaking off and doing more unnecessary things like dusting of vacuuming, basically a beligerent 5 year old, if you can imagine that. TIA I hope this makes sense :)