acoa sanctuary Community Group
The softer side of growing up in a dysfunctional home... a sanctuary to feel home with friends and never alone.
Hi Everyone,
Last weekend I spent in Hot Springs, Arkansas at a "National Recovery Month" event. I was the keynote speaker. I have spoken in the past to different groups and organizations, but nothing like this.
Maybe 1,500 people were there and it was an experience to say the least. I spent the weekend there and when it was finally time for me to share... all my fears just kind of left... I was with 1,500 people that were just like me. I didn't have to impress them or anything else... all they wanted was me.
It was a very rewarding experience... I spoke for a half-hour and finished up with a poem of mine... which got a few tears. *blushing*
On the ten hour drive home, I thanked my HP for being with me and the prayers of many people wishing me well and I realized that none of my life would be possible without 12 Step Fellowships... it was a very rewarding experience.
When I started my own recovery program I never envisioned how my life would change or the direction it would go. I am glad to have handed my life over to my HP and just being a very content child taking in all the sights and saying -wow - a lot.
When I got back people asked me how I did and I have said. I didn't strike out, nor hit a home run... I would say a solid double in the gap.
This past year has continued to impress me... not with what I have done or accomplished but what my HP continues to put in front of me and giving me the opportunity to continue to grow... and for that I will be forever grateful...
Dave
Last weekend I spent in Hot Springs, Arkansas at a "National Recovery Month" event. I was the keynote speaker. I have spoken in the past to different groups and organizations, but nothing like this.
Maybe 1,500 people were there and it was an experience to say the least. I spent the weekend there and when it was finally time for me to share... all my fears just kind of left... I was with 1,500 people that were just like me. I didn't have to impress them or anything else... all they wanted was me.
It was a very rewarding experience... I spoke for a half-hour and finished up with a poem of mine... which got a few tears. *blushing*
On the ten hour drive home, I thanked my HP for being with me and the prayers of many people wishing me well and I realized that none of my life would be possible without 12 Step Fellowships... it was a very rewarding experience.
When I started my own recovery program I never envisioned how my life would change or the direction it would go. I am glad to have handed my life over to my HP and just being a very content child taking in all the sights and saying -wow - a lot.
When I got back people asked me how I did and I have said. I didn't strike out, nor hit a home run... I would say a solid double in the gap.
This past year has continued to impress me... not with what I have done or accomplished but what my HP continues to put in front of me and giving me the opportunity to continue to grow... and for that I will be forever grateful...
Dave
So WONDERFUL to Hear, I Did think about you and wondered how your Trip had Went, However I Must Say... I Knew you would do Great... You have helped me more then you know with trying to get my Life Straight, and Find My Inner Child, and Accept what HP Throws at me... You are an Inspiration in this Program for Sure with all the Service & things that you do With Your Program... I am just Grateful that you are Kind Enough to Share Your Journey with Us...
I'm Grateful as well that you Made it home Safe & Sound, and HP Road Shot Gun .... ;)
Love, Hugs & Prayers Always My Friend...
1Ness :)
That's my kind of baseball: get 'em on, get 'em over, get 'em in.
And to me, that's a fitting analogy to the 12-Step movement. It calls us to the best of our humanity by bringing us into community and teaching us that, in order to live life fully, we must be able to give and receive. Our illnesses tell us it's all-or-nothing: we must give all the time or take all the time. Recovery teaches us the balance we never learned in our development.
I had no doubt that your share would go very well. What really rocks is how you are giving in response to what you have received in recovery. That is the thing we all need to remember and practice "in all our affairs."
Welcome back, and congratulations!
One of my favourite sayings/quotes is
"It is said there are two kinds of people in the world: givers and takers.
The takers may eat better, but the givers sleep better."
For me I have had to learn to be safe with others giving to me and me receiving their love/help etc.
I have also learnt that it is good for me to take at times it helps me and gives others a chance to give!
I guess the quote refers to those who simply take,take,take and never give.
(((Big Hugs))
Karen xx
Congratulations!
The conversation was basically about are we kicking someone when they are down when we are having good times?
I don't think it is if we do it with humility. What I mean is that I share my accomplishments not to brag, but rather to share the power of recovery and the joys that can be achieved with faith and love in a HP.
I truly believe that everything I have had the fortune to experience would not have been possible without a HP. Having that HP in my life helps me realize that my fortunes are gifts. All I had to do to receive them was have faith and some patience.
In a nutshell, what I talked about was my journey in sobriety. This is my second attempt at it. The first one lasted five and a half years, this one just recently started my 17th year. I shared why one has been working and why one didn't. There are five differences...
The first one was acceptance. My first sobriety I admitted to being an alcoholic but never really accepted it. This time I have accepted it.
The second was AA. I never really got involved in AA the first time. I went maybe three times during those five years... this time even after 17 years I try to go at least once a week.
The third was the 12 Steps. I think the first time I did the 12 Steps in a half-hour and then forgot them... this time they are with me everyday.
The fourth was a sponsor. Never had one the first time.
And then I said... the last and most important difference was an HP. I never wanted one the first time, this time I can't imagine recovery without One....
Thanks for listening,
Dave
Baseball... is the ultimate field of dreams... and to me, the best baseball movie ever made was made right next door in Iowa... it is called "Field of Dreams"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sHTsQ9qePrQ
"The conversation was basically about are we kicking someone when they are down when we are having good times?
I don't think it is if we do it with humility. What I mean is that I share my accomplishments not to brag, but rather to share the power of recovery and the joys that can be achieved with faith and love in a HP."
I can only say that with this board, we are sort of a family aren't we? I think you have, as long as I have "known" you shared unreservedly, ALL you ups and downs. When you fell on your face, you shared every detail. We sympathized with you. Why would we who care for you, not be allowed to revel in your sucess after the disappointment of last year when things didin't come together?
You came to an important destination in your journey and you celebrated that. And shared that. I'd have been a bit narked off if you hadn't. ; ) So where's it written that if someone you know isn't doing so hot you aren't allowed to be happy? Hmmmmmmm....sounds co-dependent to me. : O
I think for me it harks back to being at home.......my dad wanted me to do well and kind of celebrated my achievements ....my mum was jealous and would turn all funny and strange if I achieved something good or evening dressed up to look a bit glam for a shcool disco!
Wow! To think I still let those barbs and feelings affect me is crazy of me ......and makes me ........CODA ....EEK!!!!! I mean if i humbly mention something and others get jealous or odd........isn't that their problem. I celebrate in every single achievement - big or small that my friends have - I feel joy at their achievements.
Wow! I really do hide my achievements. That's almost being dishonest isn't it? I mean if I talk about them and am humble (I credit my HP with giving me any talents I have - I know I have to do the work but I really do credit my HP with them) then why should I not be able to share them.
To be honest , looking at it now ....I almost talk of my achievments or think of my achievemnets as if I have done something shameful by achieving.
Thank you both! Food for thought - time for a growth spurt I feel for me!
I LOVE what u wrote Hobbit re. "So where's it written that if someone you know isn't doing so hot you aren't allowed to be happy?"
Lots of love
K xx
We come together to share our experience, strength...and HOPE.
Yes, we have our struggles and share them with each other. But we're also working our programs, and sooner or later working the program bears good fruit. It's important to share that as well - when I see how someone is reaping the good stuff as a result of working the program, it renews my hope that I will reap good stuff as well by working mine.
And I think the most important thing is what Dave mentioned, and that is to frame it from the perspective of, "Look what my HP is doing in my life!" Attraction rather than promotion.
It IS the program - HP. I realize that I am capable of doing anything... but I can't do it alone. And the things I am able to do are gracious gifts given to me by my HP...
I chuckled at Hobbit's comment because I do know I have coda "qualities" and at times it is nice to know that at times the things I want to share are OK. That it's not gloating or bragging... it is very simply just giving thanks...
For me, I don't believe I am capable of doing 'anything'...infact I know I'm not. I can do alot of things but not 'anything'. My physical health stops me doing some things and because of that I have had to learn acceptance. There will also be things here that cetain members can do that I know I simply would not have the ability to do. I know Hobbit has artistic talents that are phenomenal and way beyond me.
To me we all have different talents. I am aware of some of my limitations and there are them. That is OK. Sometimes if I get it in my head that I can do anything, I almost feel shame for not being further down the line than I feel 'should' be....or that I have wasted life. For instance though there are many dancers - not all of them can be prima-ballerinas (if that is what they seek) It's not possible. There are many things I cannot realistically do......but there are so many that I can. I try to focus on them.
I am giggling at the thought of being Coda! I spend a pound on the lottery each week! Well..... I wish to switch from the National Lottery to the Irish lottery as although the prizes are alot less money - it is spread around more. Well !!!!!!! To play the National lottery I can get a ticket in any newsagents pretty much and all the supermarkets! Well to play the Irish one I have to go into my local bookmakers (Gambling shop in USA?) Oh God! I really do not want to go in there. *giggling*!!!!! I attend Quakers - I am NOT a Quaker but simply attend and enjoy the peace and beauty of the silence with other members. Well the Qs are in general opposed to gambling! I must make it clear too that the Q's accept everybody as equal and free to act with their own conscience but I just don't want to be spotted nipping in there! *giggling*
Am giggling at myself! I am free to do what i like! And basically...how important is it????? NOT very! get a grip Karen! Oh they know I am my own person and I DO the lottery but it just makes me smile to think how these little Coda behaviours can creep in! *giggling*
Anyhow I digress........I am exactly the same (((A1))) attraction not promotion - look at what my HP has done in my life. He continues to teach and help me every day. Even though there are times I struggle to feel His presence, He IS there.