The food at the convenience store in my neighborhood is so old that the expiration dates are in Roman numerals.

Time Humor
www.dailystrength.org/groups/laughterclub/discussions/messages/6440761

“I went into a general store. They wouldn’t let me buy anything specifically.”

-Steven Wright

Steven Wright Humor
www.dailystrength.org/groups/laughterclub/discussions/messages/12573789

So this guy walks into an antiques store and asks, “What’s new?”

One-Liner And Quotation Humor
www.dailystrength.org/groups/laughterclub/discussions/messages/6795267

Aspirin, 200 for $2.89 – at that price, I can’t afford not to have a headache!

Physical Pain Humor
www.dailystrength.org/groups/laughterclub/discussions/messages/12667088

The proprietor of a highly successful optical shop was instructing his son on how to charge a customer. “Son,” he said, “after you have fitted the glasses, and the customer asks what the charge will be, you say, “The charge is 98 dollars.” Then you pause and wait to see if he flinches. If the customer doesn’t flinch, you then say, “For the frames. The lenses will be another 98 dollars. Then you pause again, this time only slightly, and watch for the flinch. If he doesn’t flinch this time, you say firmly, “Each.”

Money Humor
www.dailystrength.org/groups/laughterclub/discussions/messages/6778856

Customer: Have you anything for gray hair?
Clerk: Nothing but the greatest respect.

Aging And Maturing Humor
www.dailystrength.org/groups/laughterclub/discussions/messages/10355417

Customer: Do you have baby oil?
Clerk: For or made from?