How do you put a polar bear into a refrigerator?
It's easy - just open the door and put the polar bear inside.

How do you put a walrus into a refrigerator?
Just open the door, slide the polar bear over, stuff the walrus in, and close the door.

How do you put a penguin into the refrigerator?
That's silly, penguins don't live in the Arctic - besides, the refrigerator is already full.

There is a big animal meeting in the Arctic. All the animals are supposed to be there, but one isn't. Which one is missing?
The walrus - it's still in the refrigerator.

You have to paddle your kayak across the water where dangerous polar bears swim. How will you do this without becoming polar bear lunch?
Just paddle across - all the animals are in the big animal meeting - don't you remember?

Just in: Another result of global warming - pedestrians in Iqaluit are now being pestered by polar bears asking for spare ice.

How do you tell the difference between a brown bear and a grizzly bear?

First, climb a tree. Next, observe which of the following occurs:

1. If the bear climbs the tree after you and eats you, it's a brown bear.

2. If the bear knocks down the tree and eats you, it's a grizzly bear.

Q & A in a NATIONAL PARK:

Tourist: Is it true that if you wear bells the bears won't attack you?
Ranger: NO!

Tourist: How can you tell bear scat from all the other scat?
Ranger: Look for the little bells in it!

Thanks, Dzinfizz! :-)

From Sis24 [ www.dailystrength.org/people/292893 ]:

Two guys are out in the woods hiking.

All of a sudden, a bear starts chasing them. They climb a tree, but the bear starts climbing up the tree after them.

The first guy gets his sneakers out of his knapsack and starts putting them on.

The second guy says, "What are you doing?"

The first guy says, "I figure that when the bear gets too close, we'll have to jump down and make a run for it."

The second guy says, "Are you crazy? You can't outrun a bear!"

The first guy says, "I don't have to outrun the bear. I only have to outrun you..."

BEAR IN MIND .A WITCH IN TIMES SAVES NINE........ from the ring of fire

hunting rabits is for the birds!!! hunting bear are hard to train

Pun: Just the bear necessities! (bare: minimal)

Wise person say, "Never pet a bear unless it's a rug."

Wisdom
www.dailystrength.org/groups/laughterclub/discussions/messages/3035567

I ask a friend's little boy if he would like to be the Ring Bearer in my sons wedding. The little 5 year old boy got all excited and Ya . i always wanted to wear a Bear suit !

: - ) : - ) : - )

Those are cute...

Two men went bear hunting. While one stayed in the cabin, the other went looking for a grizzly. He soon found one. Taking aim, he fired his rifle, nicking the bear. Enraged, the bear charged the hunter, chasing him back to the cabin. As the hunter reached the open cabin door, he slipped and fell. The bear tripped over him and rolled into the cabin. The man leaped up, slammed shut the cabin door behind him, and yelled to his friend inside, "You skin this one while I go get another!"

Goldilocks and the Three Bears

Once upon a time there were three bears. A Mommy bear, a Daddy bear and a Baby bear. One day they went for a walk. When they got back, Daddy bear asked, "Who's been eating my porridge?" Baby bear asked tearfully, "And who's been eating my porridge?" Mommy bear explains, "Oh, stop this silliness - I haven't made
any porridge this morning as of yet." The End

Fairy Tale And Nursery Rhyme Humor
www.dailystrength.org/groups/laughterclub/discussions/messages/12378150