One fine day, a bus driver went to the bus garage, started his bus, and drove off along the route. No problems for the first few stops, a few people got on, a few got off, and things went generally well. At the next stop, however, a big hulk of a guy got on. Six feet eight, built like a wrestler, arms hanging down to the ground. He glared at the driver and said, “Big John doesn’t pay!” and sat down at the back. The driver was five feet three, thin, and basically meek . . . naturally, he didn’t argue with Big John, but he wasn’t happy about it. The next day the same thing happened – Big John got on again, said, “Big John doesn’t pay,” and sat down. And the next day, and the one after that, and so forth. This irritated the bus driver, who started losing sleep over the way Big John was taking advantage of his size.
Finally he could take it no longer. He signed up for a body building program, karate, judo, and all that good stuff. By the end of the summer, he had become quite strong; so the next Monday, when Big John got on the bus and said, “Big John doesn’t pay!” the driver stood up, glared back, and screamed, “And why not?” With a surprised look on his face, Big John replied, “Big John has a bus pass.”

Moral of the story: First be sure there is a problem before working hard to solve it.

Question: What's worse than raining cats and dogs?
Answer: Hailing taxis.

Weather Humor
www.dailystrength.org/groups/laughterclub/discussions/messages/8235233

“Is everyone in the bus?” asked the driver before he closed the door. “No,” called a woman, “wait until I get my clothes on.” All the passengers in the bus turned towards the door to look at the woman, as she got on with a bag full of laundry.

A passenger in a taxi tapped the driver on the shoulder to ask him something. The driver screamed, lost control of the cab, nearly hit a bus, drove up over the curb and stopped just inches from a large plate glass window. For a few moments everything was silent in the cab, then the driver said, "Please, don't ever do that again. You scared the daylights out of me." The passenger, who was also frightened, apologized and said he didn't realize that a tap on the shoulder could frighten him so much, to which the driver replied, "I'm sorry, it's really not your fault at all. Today is my first day driving a cab, I have been driving a hearse for the last 25 years.

Horror Stories
www.dailystrength.org/groups/laughterclub/discussions/messages/3170741

An insane mathematician gets on a bus and starts threatening everybody: "I'll integrate you! I'll differentiate you!!!" Everybody gets scared and runs away. Only one lady stays. The guy comes up to her and says: "Aren't you scared - I'll integrate you, I'll differentiate you!!!" The lady calmly answers: "No, I am not scared, I am e^x ."

Math Humor
www.dailystrength.org/groups/laughterclub/discussions/messages/4216097

His dreams for junior
Were dimmed when son bought a cab
Though he fared quite well

-Guy Ben-Moshe.

Haiku Humor
www.dailystrength.org/groups/laughterclub/discussions/messages/13570029

Do buses run on time?
No, they run on wheels.

Miscellaneous Humor
www.dailystrength.org/groups/laughterclub/discussions/messages/8390874

Who earns a living by driving all the customers away?
A taxi-driver.

Work Humor
www.dailystrength.org/groups/laughterclub/discussions/messages/7824279

Riddle: Pretend you're a bus driver. You start at New York and fifty people get on.
Then you drive to New Jersey and twenty people get off, while five get on.
Then you go to Florida and ten people get off while fourteen get back on.
When you get to New Mexico, twenty people leave and five more get back on.
When you reach California everyone gets back on. How old is the bus driver?

Answer: Your age, remember, you're the bus driver!

Riddles
www.dailystrength.org/groups/laughterclub/discussions/messages/6376770

Question: What did the bus conductor say to the frog?
Answer: "Hop on."

Frog And Toad Humor
www.dailystrength.org/groups/laughterclub/discussions/messages/4926716

The New Bus Driver Story. While transporting some unfortunate mental patients from one secure place to another, the newly appointed bus driver stopped at a roadside restaurant for a break. On his return to the bus, all twenty patients were gone. Being a resourceful fellow and fearing the consequences of his negligence, he drove to the next bus stop, where he claimed to be a replacement for the usual service. Allowing twenty people aboard, the driver made straight for his destination, where he warned staff at the gates that the 'patients' were deluded and extremely volatile. The angry 'patients' were duly removed, sedated and incarcerated, and remained in detention for three days, until staff were able to check the records and confirm their true identities. The actual mental patients were never found.
Mental Health And Psychiatry Humor
www.dailystrength.org/groups/laughterclub/discussions/messages/8085291

These are GREAT Beaumont!
ha ha ha ha ha ha lol lol lol

I ride the bus and these are so funny...............