What is love

What is love? It is a behavior.  It is work.  It is action.  It is respect.  It is honor. It is consideration. It is trust. It is honesty and communication.  It is putting my wants and desires on hold for the good of my spouse and our marriage. It is learning to be a friend. Most of all it is a choice.  In this definition it doesn't list....it is a feeling, love is much more than a feeling.  Love is not romance.
I would like to tell you how I came to find this out.  My husband was injured 5 years ago and during the course of his injury,  I made the grievous error of trying to wear both my wife hat and my nurse hat.  My husband was permanently injured when he was given an injection into the wrong area of his buttocks.  I did not protect him, communicate what he could expect or tell him what his options were.  Instead I assisted his nurse by draping my upper body over him because I was fearful that he would move and possibly break the needle.  His trust in me has been shattered.
This event has changed him, our marriage and our relationship forever.  No where in the vows I took on our wedding day did it tell me that my job was to be a part in inflicting physical or emotional pain on my husband.  My only job as a wife is to love, honor and cherish my husband.  There is a lot more to this story, but the most important thing to learn is to love your spouse and  that will be the work of a lifetime and will take patience, courage and God's help.
My husband has a permanent injury from this event.  He has chronic pain.  He has PTSD. My husband now lives with End Stage Needle Phobia.  This means he will not seek out any medical care.  He will have no surgeries and will  receive no care for any medical problems that may develop.  Let me make this crystal clear.  Two years ago on a Sunday that I was at work, he developed chest pain.  He did not call me and he did not call 911.  He just laid on the couch and prepared to die. 
Even though I have been forgiven, this is still much to do in the way of restitution.  My objective and goal is to work diligently so that the healing process can be underway and so that some small measure of trust and respect can be established.  Please learn from this so that something good can come from our experience.  Also if you have any suggestions or can offer any help please contact us.