Loss of my mom
I lost my mom on March 7th. It has not been a month yet but that time has gone by fast. She had COPD and emphysema. She broke her hip 3 years ago and the COPD issues started progressing at that time. That was when she was put on Oxygen therapy and she moved in with me. I think she always thought that as soon as her hip healed well she would be back to living on her own and being truly independent. She was mostly ok until January of 2014 when she was hospitalized for Pneumonia and then it was one hospital stay after another. January of this year she got hospitalized again and told us she was tired of going through this. They sent her home on hospice care at the end of the month. She seemed to be doing ok, and we really did not expect it to be so soon. She did not suffer or go through some of the really bad stages of that awful disease which I am so thankful for. I worked from home, but we had another family member stay as well so they could help out while I was working. My entire daily routine pretty much was taking care of her. I don't know how to go on now. If I have someone here and the house is not so quiet it does not seem so bad. But my husband is gone from home from early morning until almost 9pm every night. My children are rarely here so those days it is just too quiet for me. I don't know how to function. I feel so empty and lost. I have a really hard time cooking dinner or being in the kitchen in general some nights. I feel myself slipping in to a depression and I do not know how to snap out of it. I want to grieve for the loss of my mom, because it was a substantial loss for me and I don't know how to share that with anyone, or communicate it with my husband. I know time will heal but how do we get through the now.