Caring for A Mother at Home: Remember Emotional Needs

You may recall my sister Cindy, but if you don't, enable me to give you a simple overview: My sister owned a very successful stuff-handling company for many years, but she gave it up to care for our parents in their later years. The timing was appropriate for our parents as well as my sister definitely needed her. Along the way, Cindy acquired much insight into caring for loved ones.
I would like to talk about a little but vital piece of the penetration Cindy comprehended while caring for our mother -- the importance of focusing on the emotional needs of the aging parent/patient, and not permitting the need for "physical attention" to become your complete relationship.
Once you read Cindy's comments below, I recommend that you simply seek help in case you end up consumed with the "physical caring" only and missing the opportunity to completely enjoy the mental and relationship needs of your beloved.
She was completely reliant and bound, while caring for my very ailing Mom in the final years of her life. Due to problems in coming off the ventilator whilst in the hospital, she had been sent home using a tracheotomy that she continued to live with. She had a feeding tube for nutritional support not to mention, she had a urinary catheter. The wide-ranging quantity of care that had to be delivered to Mom every day was overwhelming sometimes. It was important to keep the tracheotomy website, catheter website, and the feeding tube website really clean to avoid infection. Along with changing and bathing her continuously, it was a very active 24 hours.
But there was something I tended to forget. When you're ensuring you get it right and focused on a your loved one's attention, you can occasionally forget about the emotional needs of your loved one. Here are some things I learned:
Be sure their room is light with plenty of keepsakes near. Attempt to reminisce regarding the need for a certain keepsake with them and allow them to tell you stories of its own value.
If at all possible, have their bed near a window for them to look out. My mother enjoyed birds and the squirrels we fed outside her window. Place pictures of the favorite scenes within their field of vision, if no window is available.
Tune in to their own history. My mother especially liked me to pay attention to her talk about her service in WWII as a Morse code operator and viewing VHS films with her.
Take time for beauty! I learned to spend additional hours filing her nails, applying the lotions she loved, and brushing my mother's hair.
Quit and spend time together. Sometimes my mommy merely wanted me to sit with her and hold her hand. She loved me reading to her until she fell asleep.
Toward the end of Mom's time she said to me, "Please hug me, no one has hugged me lately." It broke my heart to believe I'd missed this very special section of her care. With all the continuing work that was daily to make sure her physical care was finished, I had forgotten one of the most important areas of care giving - loving and spending mother -daughter time with my Mum.
If you get in a scenario such as this, where so much physical care is being administered by you that there doesn't seem to be hours or energy please seek help. Being a caregiver might be ambitious. There are caregiver services that may allow you that time you along with your loved one really need so you can be a daughter. - Preferred Care -