I think it's important that you determine why your son came home stuttering so badly....pronto.

Good job on the NC!! That's heartbreaking about your son missing his father. If his dad is just not around and not able to be there, it seems there's not much more you can do. I really cannot tell you what to do, but what i'm learning is sometimes in life there is no easy decision. Its natural for a little kid to miss his father...but if his dad is not a good guy...then maybe its best for him to not be around his father even though he will miss him? Your son doesn't know what's best for him or you, all he knows is he misses his dad. This is a tough decision, take it day by day, keep healing with the NC, hopefully the way will become more clear once you have healed some more. And as solo said...definitely see why your son came home stuttering. That's not a good symptom, maybe something happened?

Not being a parent, I do not like to comment on parenting issues, but I have these links in my notes:

Mothers often feel guilty that they keep their children away from him
even though he is the biological father. What in the world does a
pathological have that is healthy or productive to give in parenting?

Understanding the entire package of pathology should help parents,
partners, and others make safer decisions for theirs and their childrens
future.

Hopefully, this information about Nature VS Nurture has relieved
survivors of the burdens of:

She is not strong enough to overcome his genetic propensity for
pathology.

She is not going to love him into genetic repair.
She is not going to understand his neurology into functioning.
She is not going to pray him into good neurobiology.
Beyond her ability to fix him lies the bigger issue what these forms of
pathology imply to his future functioning.

If it were me, I would take my kid to a child psychologist and try to figure out the best way to handle this for your son's soundness of mind. The fact that he comes home stuttering would cause me grave concern.

Parenting with a Narc

http://www.lovefraud.com/blog/2010/03/15/our-family-wizard-can-help-you-co-parent-with-a-sociopath/

http://tiny.cc/knmiu

http://www.lovefraud.com/blog/2009/12/21/letters-to-lovefraud-tips-for-co-parenting-with-a-sociopath/

http://tiny.cc/t9n4d

http://www.webofnarcissism.com/forums/index.php/topic,7015.0.html

http://tiny.cc/5fzsd

Mothers often feel guilty that they keep their children away from him
even though he is the biological father. What in the world does a
pathological have that is healthy or productive to give in parenting?

Understanding the entire package of pathology should help parents,
partners, and others make safer decisions for theirs and their childrens
future.

Hopefully, this information about Nature VS Nurture has relieved
survivors of the burdens of:

She is not strong enough to overcome his genetic propensity for
pathology.

She is not going to love him into genetic repair.
She is not going to understand his neurology into functioning.
She is not going to pray him into good neurobiology.
Beyond her ability to fix him lies the bigger issue what these forms of
pathology imply to his future functioning.

Parenting with a Narc

http://www.lovefraud.com/blog/2010/03/15/our-family-wizard-can-help-you-co-parent-with-a-sociopath/

http://tiny.cc/knmiu

http://www.lovefraud.com/blog/2009/12/21/letters-to-lovefraud-tips-for-co-parenting-with-a-sociopath/

http://tiny.cc/t9n4d

http://www.webofnarcissism.com/forums/index.php/topic,7015.0.html

I don't have children but I do remember when my parents separated when I was a child. My father was an alcoholic and drug addict, not abusive, but very detached and distant. He and my mother fought like cats and dogs, and the happiest day of my life was the day he moved out. I was only about 8 years old, but I still remember the relief I felt at having the fighting stop and not being around his behavior.

Now my brother who was two years younger, did miss my dad much more than I did, being the only male in the house, and he did see him from time to time, but the contact was so inconsistent and so little when it did take place. My father was very rarely sober.

When I look back it would have been wonderful if my brother could have had a better relationship with our father, but most important for our health and well being would have been to have consistent, reliable, safe, caring contact with the adults in our lives, whomever they might have been.

Your son does need a father, we all do, but he needs safety and healthy input most of all. Maybe that can come from structured visits with his father, maybe in another way. No matter how much he misses his father what he needs most from you is your good judgement and protection. But I know that is a tall order when you have a young son who just misses his dad. Just remember it isn't your fault that he can't see his father. Let his father own that burden and you just do the best you can as his mother.

Thank you all for your replies! A few days after I posted my son stopped asking for his father and it has been a blessing! Also his stutter has gotten better and better so that even when he is upset he is hardly stuttering. The kids and I have all been doing well, I think largely due to me still being No Contact!!! -I'm very proud of myself :) We had a good evening, just me and my boys. I got them all to sleep and was about to hop into bed myself when I remembered I needed to charge my phone...When I switched it on I had a txt from my son's cousin asking if he can come over for a family birthday party this weekend. I KNOW my ex had the cousin text me and I am so upset now I can't sleep, ugh! First thing tomorrow morning though, I am going to figure out all the legal paperwork because the thought of my son going and coming home stuttering like he did last time kills me inside!