I dont know the moment it happened between yesterday and today. I know with everything I am at this moment that it is exactly what I thought and what everyone has said. All of it was a lie in the beginning. He is an abusive, mean narcissist and all of the beginning was a bomb set to hook me. This is who he is and who he will always be. The beginning was an crafted illusion and I bought it hook line and sinker. I felt beautiful and wanted and loved. I felt cherished and adored and like I had met my soulmate. Then WHAM. The end had names and yelling and devaluing every single thng about me. I am affected strongly. I am confused and hurt and in so much pain. I have not been able to even reach out of it for over a week. I was trying so hard to not let go of the idea and the illusion. I dont and didnt want it to not be real. Crying.....I can not any longer believe the lie or allow myself to be belittled and riduculed and abused any longer. The truth is here and i cannot not see it anymore. God pls help me.
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