i've been married for 28 years, i'm 47 years old. my husband is a kind, caring man but he is also an alcoholic. he startd getting physically sick about 10 years ago and has been in rehab 3 times he has lost alot of weight and has changed alot in his looks over the past few years. i have been feeling so guilty for so long because i am not attracted to him anymore and although i love him as a person i don't think i love him like a husband anymore. the problem is, i'm afraid and i don't want to hurt him. i would like to live on my own but i'm not sure that i can handle the guilt if i leave him, and i'm also not sure if i could take care of myself, i've never lived alone before and sometimes i feel like i'm too old to start over. we don't have sex anymore, he wasn't able to for a few years but now that he has viagra he wants to but i don't want to anymore. i feel awful because i feel like i am judging him on the way he looks, but i also have lost respect for him because he won't quit drinking even after all of the problems it has caused. i really need some advice, i feel like i'm stuck. i just want to be happy again.
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