Thought I was doing beter these last couple of weeks. I have a new granddaughter and I thought that was was helping. It was hard when she was born because he should of been there. My son-in-law's father was there which didn't help. I know he had every right to be there too. I kept thinking of what my husband (John) would of said. I missed that smile he would of had. I know I would be worse off if I didn't have family. I keep saying to myself if not for my 2 grand kids and 2 kids I would of went with him. Today is supposed to be a happy day shared with your husband. My granddaughter is coming home. I thought I was doing better today with my grandaughter coming home so I deceided to go through his clothes since its been 4 months now. Well, I was wrong. That just started an empty feeling. It felt like it had just happend all over again. I miss him so much. I was married to him for 32 years and we were dating since I was 14. I keep telling my self to keep going. I just don't know life without him in my world. I know alot of people feel the same way I do on this board. Thank you for listening. I just had to vent.
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