Forgive yourself. If this man were alive and in his right mind and loved you he would tell you this and to have peace. You did not cause his death. He had a bad heart and nothing you did or didn't do could change his lifespan. Anyone who is bad to you might should be blocked from all access to you now...you are the widow not them and you need safety. You have enough to handle just because of the death you do not need anyone accusing you. You are human and all humans are faulty. Given enough time and all the stress those very same relatives who judge you may well have done the SAME thing you did. They may be nasty to begin with but now they are in pain and nasty...you can't win there as you need your own healing. Forgive yourself. You are loved and you are forgiven already. There is good life ahead for you and it will not always be so hard.
Blame: Let it go. The worse thing I did was blame myself...that was the most deadly thoughts. People die, it's part of life, and we grieve and one day it gets easier. Forgive.

please try to forgive yourself - I cannot say better than debra - I do wish your in laws felt better and understood more about this and how you are hurting - their support would mean so much....you take care....Cathrynn X

No one knows the life you lived daily with your husband. No one can judge you for what you did or did not do. You do not deserve what they are putting upon you. We each can only do the best for ourselves every day and hope it affects others positively. Hugs to you.

Blame, who is to blame for a person not taking care of themself? My husband passed away after triple bypass surgery that he never recovered from. I gave it my all and gave him every chance to live. His diabetes and lifestyle took it's toll. I blamed myself for not hounding him more to eat right, stop drinking and smoking. Stop crying and be good to yourself. No one knows what went on between the two of you especially when he was ill. Love yourself you deserve it.