I have been dating a widower for the last few months and he is very overwhelmed about his home and all of his wife's belongings. I have offered to help him in any way I can, but am very cautious. He enjoys spending time at my home with my children and I. I love him very much and want to be there for him and hope to have a future with him when he is ready. I have no where to turn, and feel guilty when I think of how happy I am with him,( her death was result of a car accident) but am very careful about revealing all my thoughts and feelings to him. He recently spent 4 days wanting to be alone, but he called me to tell me what he was going through and I understand. When I don't hear from him for a couple of days, I panic that something is wrong. I don't like that feeling, and he has reassured me that he feels good with me and we enjoy each other very much, and that we are ok. I have been really good about listening and supporting him and am willing to be there for him. We talked tonite and he is feeling a rush of emotions and wants to be alone. I thanked him for telling me and reassured him that I am here for him. I would love to spend my life with him, don't want to lose him, but want to be very cautious about all of this, plus, the guilt I feel for being happy with him in my life. Just a note, we dated 30 years ago and always stayed on each other's "short" list, so I feel there is a sort of foundation to us. Any thought from anyone will really help. I plan to go back to my pscychologist this week.
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