I can't do it. Saying, "Goodbye" would be too much of a final blow to my life of disability and being left alone. The best I can manage at this time is, "Wish you were here."; "I miss you."; "I'm glad we were best of friends as well as soul mates." Our home is filled to the brim with all of these wonderful memories of the life we shared. Those memories sustain me in a world that does not want to waste it's time on a disabled, home-bound widow. My home filled to the brim with wonderful memories along with my garden and pets fills me with gratitude. I don't mind being home-bound that much any longer. The world around me has tried every way it can think of to let me know that the isolation and suffering of one disabled, home-bound widow does not matter in the least. So my home, garden and pets along with the wonderful memories of a wonderful human being/friend/soul mate make up my world. Life is getting better now that I have stopped fighting to rejoin the "rat race" of the world around me. It feels good to wake up now in love with my world just where it is today without trying to achieve someone else's idea of what I should or should not being doing. Life has now developed a better flow as I learn acceptance.
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