First year mark of that faithful January night. I always said I did not want to mark the day. I just want to forget it ever existed but I know I just cant, I think about it all the time anyway. So I will use this forum to write about what she meant to me. Maybe it will make someone else think of their loved one and just know you are not alone in how you feel.

The days seem longer, time is just time ticking endlessly. The pain of living another day without you diminishes, but the realization that you are gone echoes like the roaring train in our empty home. As I close my eyes and chase your images, it teases me knowing I can never capture them or hold them. I can see your perfect smile and hear you're cheerful laughter, haunting me of wasted times that I took for granted. The reasons you are not here are secondary to the reasons that I need you to be here. It's not enough to say I miss you, it's not enough to say how much I love you or that we will be together someday. Words so full of emotions, which are said and disappear like a cool breath on a rainy, January night. It's just not enough. The hunger to hear you, to see you, to feel you runs deep in my heart like an endless surge of electricity, building and building only to ignite at a simple glimpse of your picture, a verse form your favorite song or a phantom thought that once made me smile. These feeling I hold so deep that the right words can never reach and the promises of love that will never be told. I know as time moves on, everything will change but love remains the same. I will love you forever.
SWEET DREAMS.