My husband, Don, died 3 months ago, and I feel like the grief is getting worse instead of better. I know it's the day-to-day reality of his being gone. I'm having to do all the things he always did and I find myself crying and crying. Mowing the lawn...checking the oil in the car... running to the store for me.... taking care of the car insurance .... taking the dogs in for their shots and grooming, rotating the tires on the car, etc. I think right now the hardest part is the yardwork. Don LOVED gardening... the yard was his pride and joy. There wasn't one dandelion in the whole place. He edged everything. The yard looked like velvet. I had to move to a different house for financial reasons and I don't even know where to start to make the lawn look nice. All I can do is mow the weeds. I took out the weed-eater to get the weeds next to the house and burned the motor up!! I want to have a nice looking lawn in his memory, and I don't know what to do. Does anyone know if there's a "Gardening for Dummies" book out there? He was the gardener, I wasn't. I cried all weekend. I cried walking through the park with the dogs, I cried everytime I was in the car, I cried all the way through church. The only time I didn't cry was when I was with the grandkids because I didn't want to worry them. I keep telling God that I want him back, even though I know that's impossible. My pastor's wife said I need to release Don from my heart so that I can start feeling peace. When will it start getting easier? -Linda
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