My husband died Dec 12th. As I'm sure happened to all of you I am still in disbelief and all I can do is cry. Several times a day I just burst into sobbing and it doesn't matter if I'm home alone or out in public. I just can't control it. Everything makes me think of Ty. Everything makes me cry. I'm all alone where I am in Florida and I'm scared. I can't stand to go to the grocery store since that's the last thing we did together. I have a heightened fear that I'm going to die or someone else I love is going to die. Is that feeling normal? I've already ended up in ER once since he died. I don't get to see a sudden death grief counselor until the 22nd and I ordered a book to read called I wasn't ready to say goodbye but I don't know what else to do to try to help myself. I'm back at work which is so hard-for 3, 12 hr night shifts I have to hold it together but it just about kills me. People don't call like they did the first 2 weeks. I know they have to get on with their lives but it still hurts. I'm sorry I'm rambling. I am so tired-can't sleep much. I never thought in a million years I would have to be in a widows support group. Nothing is right.
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