I've found myself saying this so many times in the past week. About everyday things that I've really never done. I was looking at the leaves falling. I never raked. Had a husband and a son that did that. (Son now lives 500 miles away.) Just looking at the size of the yard and the size of those trees, I felt overwhelmed. But then I thought, "I can do this." I'd never started my husband's motorcycle. But I knew he'd want me to to keep the battery charged and the engine lubed. It was his pride and joy and *some day* I'll have to sell it. Can't watch it rust out. And I said, "I can do this." I asked my husband to guide my hand, and I think he did. It started! Then the garage door got stuck open. That little red light kept sensing something and it wouldn't close. I didn't have a clue what to do, and I said "I can do this." Once again, it was like he guided my hand and I reached up and pulled a cord that disabled the opener. The door closed easily by hand then. Just little things like that...But what I don't know is if I can ever get rid of the pain and grief. Guess I'll have to keep telling myself "I can do this." I know it will take a while, but with my husband's help, reminding me that he wanted a good life for me, I'll be able.
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