
Widows & Widowers Support Group
This community is dedicated to those who have lost a husband, wife, or partner. Anything is open for discussion here, with the hope that we can focus on grief, bereavement, life after loss, and continuing on after a great loss.

deleted_user
I have searched the support groups in my area, and even tried one for "the young widows/widowers", but I am only 21, and my secret fiance, the absolute love of my life who I had a beautiful future with coming my way until he was killed in a car crash and never came to pick me up (I waited three hours until I called his parents and they told me he was dead).
Everyone else has all these memories, all this evidence of their life with their spouse, but I only have a few (relatively to 23 year marriages) memories, a few tokens he touched, not to mention I had no rights at all when he died because we kept our engagement secret for reasons. What I really have left is our dreams of what our life was going to be. He wanted to be a dad so much, we were going to make a lovely family...
Anyways, all I am asking is if there is anyone else who is in their 20's or 30's who didn't have 10 or more years of marriage under their belt and didn't have any warning the death was coming? My psychologist said maybe I could find a group of people in a similar situation online since it is not too common for 21 year olds to be engaged, none-the-less already lost that person....just kinda want to find people who can relate without those years of memories and a whole house to prove to them their love really happened....
Thanks
Everyone else has all these memories, all this evidence of their life with their spouse, but I only have a few (relatively to 23 year marriages) memories, a few tokens he touched, not to mention I had no rights at all when he died because we kept our engagement secret for reasons. What I really have left is our dreams of what our life was going to be. He wanted to be a dad so much, we were going to make a lovely family...
Anyways, all I am asking is if there is anyone else who is in their 20's or 30's who didn't have 10 or more years of marriage under their belt and didn't have any warning the death was coming? My psychologist said maybe I could find a group of people in a similar situation online since it is not too common for 21 year olds to be engaged, none-the-less already lost that person....just kinda want to find people who can relate without those years of memories and a whole house to prove to them their love really happened....
Thanks
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I also did not have any rights when my husband died because all of the military paperwork was filled out before he left and he could not give me rights at that time because we were not married yet, so (although nothing is ever exactly the same) I do know how it feels to not be included.
When I have a really bad day (as we all do), I just remember that even though no one else seems to understand, I do. I know how much we loved each other and that is more important than what anyone else thinks. Don't let anyone or anything else take that away from you.
I am always here if you need to talk.
I am 25 years old. I completely understand how isolated you feel in this situation because there are few people in our shoes.
The love of my life was killed on aug 25th when he was struck by lightning. I too feel that i have lost all my dreams for the futur. He was my entire world . I still have no idea i how can possibly survive without him.
I find it very hard to relate to anybody, even other grievers. I get angry at people for not understnading how it feels. FOr not having to feel this pain.
Nikki
We had plans and now I don't know what to do with myself. Part of me also passed away 3 months ago. It just seem that when everything was going so great, something like this happened. It is not fair and I feel cheated of what should have been our life together.
I am here if you want to chat...
My Motto for 2008
~ PATIENT..POSITIVE..STRONG ~
carmen