Let me give you some background info of what made me restart this group again. Recently I was dx'd with cptsd, in addition I have bp 1. For nearly a life time, I cant remember any time in my life where I didn't have a problem with my self immage or procrastination.
Thus I have the sad belief with in me that I've not lived up to my potentntial. At 66 I am reviewing my life to find passion, purpose and meaning. I just want to feel better, and know I have To Do Better to make the changes in my daily life...Hard!!
For most of the years I've lived I've given to others the help they needed, I've encouraged and supported others in achieving their goals. I've helped others through my own life experience and knownedge, yet I do not do the simplist things daily to give myself the care and validation that I am worthwile, that I deserve good things in my life. I'm either a bull to get things done or a procrastinator and don't even start. More times than not I set myself up for failure by goals that can not be met, or I start something and don't fininish to completion.
The above has been a question of 'what is wrong with me', again for a lfe time. I seek out the approval of others and do for them to gain acceptance and validation, why, because I learned in childhood 'the stupid little girl' was not competent. I was raised by two alcoholcs, in a house of chaos...today I've forgiven them, as they had no idea of what they were doing. After becominng a parent myself, I found I was doing many of the same bhaviors which horrified me. I've since asked my son to forgive me and have told him he can talk to me about Anything.
For me restarting WDYW is going to be a sort of journal, ideas, possibilities and a record of daily goals. The goals can be as simple as getting out of bed, brushing my teeth and getting dressed. The goals can be drinking 5 12pz glasses of water and eating healthy meals./ Harder goals will be to get out of my house, to get some sort of exercise each day. Do my one chore of the day to keep my home clean. And to do something to feed my soul, calm down my anxiety and find some peace. To "Fail Forward" and how "Procrastination and Ptsd" are related.
I Want This Group to be a safe, positive and afferming group to bring self esteem, self worth, accomplishments into your life. Validation of the efforts you take and support to help you to take baby steps forward, then walk, then run. Change is hard, change is a process. For me I've lived a life of codependency and procrastination...in August I'll be 67...where is time Go!!
For this week and the rest of my life (I Hope) I'm beginning to build "infastruction" of my well of life in order to get out of the deep hole. I'm working on getting post it notes to put around my house with positive affermations, work towards completing my daily scheduled house chores ~~~ one baby step at a time...no time frame, just from the time I get up to the time I go to bed the chore is completed.
Please forgive spelling errors :) I spell phonic
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RPTOrqQvABE John Maxwell, Failing Forward audio book
My Best To You!!
Having been around many moons, I have met members from all over...I'm just wondering, if you don't mind sharingWhere are you????
A couple of days ago a bout of depression has smacked me in the face. I've been lying in bed most of the day. Not really sleeping just sort of thinking. When I get up to get for something, I start to cry. Then I have to listen to my son and his grandma's problems which I'm simpathetic to, but makes me feel worse. I don't how much more I can take. I hang on because my medication will...