To get right to it I've had small problems with panic attacks since I was little but they were never really a big deal. At least until now anyways. I noticed when I was younger that I had a tendency to imagine worst case scenerios out of every day normal situations. For example, when I was around 8 I was decorating the Christmas tree and I could vivdly imagine the tree falling on top of me and no one could help me up. I began to panic and cry. Since then it seems to have gotten a little worse. For example, I can imagine people getting into accidents and just horrible things happening. And its not that I want them to happen, I just think about what COULD happen and then I panic and cant breath and just want to sit in a corner and cry.
Reading this over I feel like it sounds silly. I dont want bad things to happen to the people I love and care about but I also cant stop thinking that anything bad can happen. On top of that I've noticed that I've had more anxiety attacks in the past 3 yrs then I've had my entire life. Everything stresses me out. Getting on the subway is a big issue. I normally wear glasses now because I feel awkward having people stare and me stare back. When I get on a crowded train my breathing gets heavier and harder and I cant wait to get off at my stop. Even with headphones on and music blaring I feel really uncomfortable. Maybe Im just weird. I've thought that maybe I was too stressed and need to relax but its like there's always something. I guess Im looking for a little advice on how to handle everything??