im sure u all feel this way sometimes but some days it just is so overwhelming! just to know that even though u may be doing ok right now doesnt mean that u will be next week or even the next day. the fact that nothing is ever going to cure me and there will never be a day where i am not constantly reminded of my illness is too much to handle sometimes. on good days you always have to wonder when your going to wake up one morning and be depressed or manic because no matter how good you may feel right now it will happen again. it really bothers me that this is something that i have to deal with every day for the rest of my life. i will freak out again, i will be hospitalized again and i will put my family through hell again. any advice on how to deal with that cause it sure scares the fuck out of me!
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