Hi. Im 39 yrs old and have been ttc for 2yrs. This is with the help of a fertility doctor. I was told i had fibroids but they werent a problem for me to conceive. After each treatment of pills and procedures, im still left feeling less of a woman. Ive dieted because im plus size and that the first thing they talk about. Ive stopped drinking alcohol and coffee. I work out. I take prenatals and other vitamins. And im still disappointed. I know the hurt of trying so hard to get pregnant then it seems like the person next to you gets pregnant. Im tired of people talking bout they know how i feel but they have kids. They dont know the hurt and pain. My husband and i have argument s because he dont understand. Every period im disappointed. Every procedure im more disappointed. And it makes me feel less and less of a woman. Its like a empty feeling. I just want to conceive a child of my own. Feel that life growing inside of me. I know there are kids that need to be adopted. I went down that route of being guardian to a young child. I had him since he was 9 months because he was aproduct of drug and alcohol abuse. I loved him like he was my own. When he turned 4 is when things went down hill. He was diagnosed with ADD. But as he got older he got more violent and abusive towards me. Imagine a child you nurtured and loved hitting on you. Cussing you. Being afraid to sleep at night because you dont know if you will wake up the next day because of his violent tendencies. I was put on 2 types of stress meds, a stress/blood pressure. Might body was always in pain from stress and him. The state stepped in and took him out my home. I couldnt save him. And that kind of killed me. So id rather have my own child. That i know will be healthy in my womb and that i will know whats wrong.
day 2-this is so hard waiting!!!!!Only my 4th time around and I hate this two weeks where I can’t tell anyone or tell for myself if it worked. Please send prayers!
Logically, I know it's not true but, it feels like every single day now someone else is announcing they are pregnant, or having their baby. Both my siblings have children now. My sister-in-law is also due any moment. And here I am- no children, desperately trying and starting in on fertility treatments this month. My hope... I'm trying my damndest to stay positive that maybe for my husband and I,...