I have been feeling extremely down lately and have seemed to have lost all hope. It just never seems like it will get better. I am in physical pain every day and can't even eat. This is no way to live, I have been fighting the pain for years, but it is getting to be too much. My friend asked me if I was going to go to her b-day party this year and I couldn't even answer. I don't want to lie, because I don't know if I will make it that long. It just really really sucks when you know it will never get better. Is suicide really that horrible when all you do all day anyways is sit at home in pain, not able to eat. It gets so horribly painful it is hard for me to even swallow liquids. I just don't know what to do anymore.
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