Hello all. I was on here about 3 years ago due to our baby daughter emily dying of SIDS. well since then we have had 3 early miscarriages, and just the other day we needed to be induced with our baby brianna due to compications of turners syndrome she had nonimmune hydrops and died inside of me. we gave birth to a tiny baby girl whom we named brianna faith. she was so tiny but beautiful. I feel like my world is crashing down on me. I am swinging between numbness to deep sorrow to anger. I dont know if it is all catching up to me from losing all of our babies within such a short time but i feel like I am barely holding on to life right now. I have a 6 year old daughter whom I've held on to in the past with emily's death and our other miscarriages for hope and strength, but this time everything seems to be hitting tenfold for some reason. I am having a very hard time hanging on to anything for hope. I just want to go to sleep and never wake up. I am trying very hard not to feel this way but its almost this uncontrollable deep dark abyss that keeps sucking me further. I'm sorry if i'm rambling I am just trying to reach out to see if anybody else has been in this mind frame before. I'm sure we'll make it through I am just very scared right now with this horrible feeling. I just dont have the will to live right now. Help me if anybody can. Thank you for your time.
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