I am at my in laws right now and they have a foster child Collin's age; 9. We live in the sticks so the boys can run around and usually we don't have to worry. There is a tiny little pond down by the trail and the boys wanted to go play. Now mind you that my son knows the area well. My mother inlaw and I were just talking about Deven and the baby they lost 29 years ago. Well after a while I said haven't the boys been gone for a while. so I went to the back door and called Collin. Since I din't hear him we walked dowm by this little pond and my baby wasn't there. So I start screaming his name then I heard collin barely so i kept calling and listening. a few seconds later it sounds like collin is crying. i start running through the pond and in the woods screaming for collin and the further i get in the woods the more i can hear him crying. I still don't know how i ran in the right direction but after i fell over a couple of trees i could see collin. i yelled at him to stay there and i ran to him. he was so scared. the boys got lost and collin kept saying how did you know where to find me? I still don't know but what i do know is that i was scared shitless especially i don't know but a hundren and one things were going through my head. i am thankful that i have been working out because my mother in law couldn't even believe how fast i was running. i just took a lorazepam because i am so shaken up i can barely keep my legs from shaking and writing this is kind of bringing my anxiety back down but i really think i should have a drink. I barely ever drink but i haven't been that scared since i found my Deven. thankyou God for not taking my Collin. i know i'm am slightly over racting but even if Deven hadn't of died i know i would of been pretty damn scared. I know in my mind collin was fine, he knows his way in the woods i just think the two boys got a bit turned around. non the less i need to try and relax!
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