Anyone see the commercial pampers has with the babies sleeping and the x-mas song "Silent Night" playing? Well, I just did not not long ago and it made me so sad and angry at the same time. Seeing the babies sleeping made me think of Aiden and all of our angels who went to sleep and never woke up. Also, all the x-mas commercials about what to get your kids for x-mas. I don't have any little ones to buy for this year...well of my own. I have a 10 yr. old neice to buy for. She called me last week and said " Aunt Chrissy I know you don't have much money this year for x-mas so what I would like to have is a picture of my cousin Aiden because I never got the chance to meet him." How could I say no to her..she's so sweet! So I went to the store the other day and I found a really cute picture frame with a cowboy hat in one corner and on the opposite cowboy boots in blue! But other than that I just can't stand it! I want this season to be over with already and into 2009. I don't know how much more I can take! I just miss Aiden soooo much and it hurts so much that I can't do this stuff for him like I was suppose to! Will this pain ever go away? Aiden was my one and only and now even though I have friends and family and a great hubby I still feel all alone. Am I still a mom? At times I do feel like I am, but others I don't. Aiden and I spent the most time together. I nursed him till 3.5 months then I went back to work p/t like 20 hr. a week in which hubby was with him, but other than that it was me and him. When he woke at night it was me not hubby. This just sucks!! I love and miss you Aiden!! Sorry I'm rambling on, but has these things effected anyone else this season or is it just me?
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