we have custody of our soon to be six yr old autistic stepson. here is the deal, divorce papers say every other weekend, list of holiday, ect...mom will not find a job the lets her off on everyother weekend, she signed the custody papers agreeing to these visitation times. now she wants to see him every monday and thursday night. after we refused to let her stop paying child support and give up her rights she is demanding this. she is a registered nurse that can get a job anmywhere that will work with her visitation schedule, where she works now she could transfer to a different schedule. I have no problem with her seeing her son, i know he needs his mother and to be honest i could use the break every few days. BUT, Adam is autistic, routine is a must in his life. he has seen his mother 2 times since august of 2006 when she walked out on him. I got with his dad a few months later and i have been taking care of adam ever since then. after visits with his mom he is extremely tramatized. for those of you who do not understand autism i can only say thank God everyday that your children do not have it. autism is a crule disease that effects a childs mind and causes severe behavior, verbal, and sensory problems. she walked out on this child because he was not 'perfect'. she asked us to allow her to give up her rights and stop paying child support (which i would gladly do for his sake) and because we will not she wants to disrupt our lives to suit her. i do not know how to tell adams dad that although i love them both dearly, and no matter what i have no intentions of going anywhere, i do not feel like i deserve to be used like this. she wants me to raise her son and work my schedule to suit her. i do not want to watch adam go through this kind of thing twice a week. it took me 2 months to get h im back on track and i do not want to go through this every few days. i am prepared to handle every other weekend but i am not sure i can handle every few days and i k now adam cant handle it. he is so adorable but after he sees her he is horrible. he is agressive and has meltdowns and potties on him self he regresses so badly. how do i make his dad understand that letting her do this and messing up what i have went through total hell to get right and adam has went through total hell as well is a bad idea. i know he wants adams mom in adams life, hell i do to but not at the expense of the sanity of my household.
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