I am a single woman that lives with a bio dad and child of 7 yrs old. When bio dad and I first met he did not have full custody of his son. Then after about 1 year of dating He is confronted from his Ex that she can no longer take care of their son due to financial and living situations. mind you that dad has all along wished to rescue son from his neglactant mother. So the issue arises with me as it is my home whom dad has moved into and the place where son would be moving into also. I feel like I have been cornered. I never wanted children and have lived my live with freedom to come and go as I please. Now I have fallen inlove with this man whom now has the chance to have full custody of his son (that wil take him from a neglectant mother and potential dangerous household. The agreement was that the bio mother was to take her son on the week ends leaving me and the bio dad a break together. So taking that into consideration that I would still have one on one time with the man I have fallen in love with, I agreed to his son living with us. Well the weekend visitations lasted for 1 month and now after 1 1/2 yrs have resolved to nothing.... no contact from bio mother not even a phone call in the last 8 months. She always avoids our calls and requests for his visitation with her. Mean while this 7 yr old shows many signs of neglect abuse and emotional trama due to unstability on mothers part. I was over whelmed with all this new change and what I was supost to get and what I really got. I feel sorry for the same boy yet can not bond with him. I am concerned for his saftey (who would like to see a child grow up in his situation with his mother)At the same time I am expected to have all this responsability put on me to step in and be his role model mother becuase I agreed to his living with us. The child shows emotional problems stemming from his mother -son relationship (Attachment disorder , ADD, social skill, ect) I have stepped forward and got him some psych help therapy and councelling. This has helped some. But I am still overwelmed with all the stress and pressure that goes with filling mothers shoes as she has abandond him in last 8 months totally. Everyone feels sorry for the boy from what has happened to him and I feel cornered into playing this role just to be with the man I love. We never get a break or time alone. We have no outside support from family .... non what so ever. Not even to babysit when I went to hospital. It has been 8 months since dad and I have had even a date just the two of us. This is really taking a toll on or relationship. I feel like I am just here to be a caregiver/mother not a girlfriend anymore. Pleas someone understand where I am coming from as most people think I am ignorant and selfish. I am so confused if I am in the right place or should I let my lover go.
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