Step Families Support Group
Traditionally, a stepfamily is the family one acquires when a parent enters a new marriage, whether the parent was widowed or divorced. This community is focused on many of the relationships and issues that may arise within stepfamilies where you may find answers from some members and you may help other members with their questions.
Well my husband has three daughters and two of them have children of their own and the other lives with us in out home and has all but 2 months of the three years that we have been married. His oldest Daughter hates me.. When she had her son I was not allow to be there. She refuses to except me cause I am 14 years younger than her Father. Ironically her and her mother are like ducks and water where you have one the other is not far behind.. The middle daughter was going through a divorce and lived with us she would not have anything to do with her mother cause she said the mother was into drugs and that is why we were able to get custody of the 13 year old cause their mom was in trouble for drugs..Once the middle daughter was done using us for a place to live rent free her and her mother are also like ducks and water.. This ex wife has done everything from standing right in front of me and asking my husband to marry her again since they would be sharing custody of the minor child over the summer until they went back to court on the final hearing.. This woman has called and told me she was having me thrown in jail and marry my husband while I was there.. She has tried having me arrested and one of the latest things has been that her and the middle daughter have stole some stuff from a public rented storage shed that was in mine and the daughters names.. That would not be so bad but it was every bit of the christmas decorations that we had and yeah that kind of stuff might can be replaced except the personalized ornaments with the years on them and the things that were in there that was given to me by my uncle that passed away on Halloween this year.. She has tried to get my husband fired from his job.. We had words and they were not nice ones in my front yard and of course she ran and called the police on me and tried to have me arrested and when that did not work she waited till about 20 minutes after the cops left my house and called me and cussed me and screamed.. One time she got mad cause she filed some court papers and we got them dismissed and she called the lawyers office and cussed his secretary.. She is HORRIBLE!!! I am to a point with his older children that I can not forgive them for things that they have done to me and that makes things hard for me and him and my relationship with the younger child.. Does anyone have an suggestions??? The last thing I want in life is to come between my husband and his children but I just can not forgive them for what they have done to me.. I am expected to love those grandbabies all the same but I can not be there when they are born cause his ex does not want me there.. She and the middle daughter can steal from me and I am just suppose to act like it never happened and the youngest we get along if her mother is not in the picture.. she tends to dissappear I can remember the youngest's 12 b-day her mom never even call her.. I had to hold her when she cried and try to make it all better and who always gets the credit for everything well of course Mommy!!! I get called by my first name and marked as "my dad's wife" but I still get to be the one that does the motherly chores... When and where does this all stop.. My marriage can not take this much longer... I love him but enough is enough... Where does this stop.... What can I do different to make things easier??? any one have any ideas????
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theatre and I are there already. I'm having a very berry tea with crackers, cheese and cherry tomatoes and she's having a joint with some beer and we're both on really comfy recliners on thick pile carpet. we need some help with the decor if anyone is around??
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I'm trying to exercise daily. I was doing fairly well until I sprained my ankle 2 weeks ago but now I'm getting back on the horse. Today I walked over a mile with my arm weights that are about 22lbs total. I was out of shape and it was hard on my arms. I also did my 30 situps. I'm also going to drink a lot of water and try to eat healthy. I do tend to have a sweet tooth but I'm cutting...
The way that I look at the blended family situation is this (or a marriage in general).
1st: Your spouse should always come first even before the children. The reason is because your children will grow and have families of their own and if you neglect your spouse/marriage what will be there when the children are gone?
2nd as parents/spouses together you put the needs of the children first. So basically, you decide as a couple what the priority is.
Also, if both people in a marriage is always putting the other first then neither person will be left needing or wanting. The children won't either because together you'll do what's best for them.
I am sure having adult children is much more difficult. I would say at this point that it is time for your husband to tell his children that you are a part of his life and that you aren't going anywhere. They are adults and can make their own choices and will be held accountable for those choices. If they want him at grandbabies parties, etc... you need to be welcomed as well. At the very least, out of respect for their father. If they can't do that then they don't respect him so they aren't going to respect you....