Step Families Support Group

Traditionally, a stepfamily is the family one acquires when a parent enters a new marriage, whether the parent was widowed or divorced. This community is focused on many of the relationships and issues that may arise within stepfamilies where you may find answers from some members and you may help other members with their questions.

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Do I have a right to say anything?

deleted_user
deleted_user
I am not the step-mom officially yet, but my fiance's daughter has been making not so wise decisions and her father and grandmother are babying her and not making her see what she has done wrong and her mother, well she gave birth and that is about it.
The "precious" daughter has an 81/2 month old son and is now pregnant again.
CPS has been called in because the baby is delayed in his learning, then they showed up at the house and the apartment is a disaster( after I took a day and went out and helped them clean it) niether one of them(the daughter and the boyfriend) work, so there is no reason for the place to be that bad. then they tricked the grandmother into spending $100.00 on them when they are getting cash assistance and food stamps. This has angered me in such a way,then to watch the father or grandmother do nothing but let it slide. Do I have any right to step in and tell the "precious" daughter that she should not be using people and she made her decision to get pregnant twice?
deleted_user
deleted_user
Are you angry with the daughter for living her life the way she does, or with the father ane grandmother for allowing it? Is she over 18? If so, then she's an adult who can make her own decisions, and even if you were the stepmother it would not be a good idea to tell the daughter what you think of her lifestyle. I would say that if anything, talk to your fiance about allowing his daughter to get away with things and babying her.
deleted_user
deleted_user
Tell your fiance that you are concerned. Like Unique said, if she's older than 18, there's not much you can do except talk to him about things.
deleted_user
deleted_user
I know where you are coming from. As you know....I know of your situation personally. I agree with you, that your future step-daughter should be dealt straight-forward with. It's a lot on how I feel about my step-daughter. People are so afraid of upsetting her. Way back when......oh say 10 years ago, when we knew that my step daughter, who was not my step-daughter yet was sexually active. I felt that she should have been taken to the dr. and be put on birth control, but no one wanted to deal with her. I thought her mother should have been the one to take her, but my step-daughter said no, so no one took her. All her father said to me was, she's 18 and we can't make her go. Yes she was 18, she a senior in high school. I was at that wakward stage of not being her step-mother yet, but wanting to smash the 3 heads of the adults in her life that impacted her more to get her to go. Oh, well I know where you are coming from.
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