Step Families Support Group
Traditionally, a stepfamily is the family one acquires when a parent enters a new marriage, whether the parent was widowed or divorced. This community is focused on many of the relationships and issues that may arise within stepfamilies where you may find answers from some members and you may help other members with their questions.
ok i am sure you all have heard this before
I married a loving lady a few years ago and we hhad been doing fine. Well my step daughter has done everything in her power to break us up from running away to getting pregnat at 16. She is now 17 and is using the baby as a weapon against my wife (who wants only the best for her daughter and the baby). My step daughter threatens to leave at 18 and that really bothers my wife. But she lets my step daughter continue to do these things.
My wife has gone into a state of depression and has come up with wild ideas from having the boy friend move in to trying to do every thing the step daughter asks like buying her things.
Now with my wife finally seeing a doctor and being diagosed with depression the step daughter just wont lay off her and give her some space. The step daughter even has gone so far as bring home from school things that she says point out what my wife did wrong raiseing her. I know i cant say anything to the step daughter she only blows up on me. Her father wants nothing to do with her
I feel like sometimes they would be better off with out me there. I am going out of my mind
I married a loving lady a few years ago and we hhad been doing fine. Well my step daughter has done everything in her power to break us up from running away to getting pregnat at 16. She is now 17 and is using the baby as a weapon against my wife (who wants only the best for her daughter and the baby). My step daughter threatens to leave at 18 and that really bothers my wife. But she lets my step daughter continue to do these things.
My wife has gone into a state of depression and has come up with wild ideas from having the boy friend move in to trying to do every thing the step daughter asks like buying her things.
Now with my wife finally seeing a doctor and being diagosed with depression the step daughter just wont lay off her and give her some space. The step daughter even has gone so far as bring home from school things that she says point out what my wife did wrong raiseing her. I know i cant say anything to the step daughter she only blows up on me. Her father wants nothing to do with her
I feel like sometimes they would be better off with out me there. I am going out of my mind
-
theatre and I are there already. I'm having a very berry tea with crackers, cheese and cherry tomatoes and she's having a joint with some beer and we're both on really comfy recliners on thick pile carpet. we need some help with the decor if anyone is around??
-
I'm trying to exercise daily. I was doing fairly well until I sprained my ankle 2 weeks ago but now I'm getting back on the horse. Today I walked over a mile with my arm weights that are about 22lbs total. I was out of shape and it was hard on my arms. I also did my 30 situps. I'm also going to drink a lot of water and try to eat healthy. I do tend to have a sweet tooth but I'm cutting...
What I did was tell my wife that if she wished to continue living with her daughter she was welcome to do so. But without me.
We would still be married, just living apart. When her daughter got on her own feet we would live together again. Not divorced, not seperated in the normal sense of the word. Just living apart.
One advantage is you'll have removed a major bone of contention for the girl.
Rent a one bedroom or smaller apartment near work and move into it. I'll almost guarantee things will change.
But you have to be prepared that your wife has so much invested in her daughter you might be gone a long time while you try to convince your wife that a parents true job is to let go. Once the girls leaves high school she's on her own.
But you may fail and find you are expendable. Maybe that's better than what you've got going now.
What I think you need to do (and normally I would never give this advice, but I really think it kinda needs to be done here) is to take your SD aside and talk to her privately. Tell her that she is really upsetting her mother and you won't stand for it. I know that's harsh, but the girl needs a wake-up call! Tell her that she needs to stop acting as she is and at least stop putting so much on her mother. And when she tries the "I'm-moving-out-when-I'm-18" card, just say go ahead. She's probally not going to, because she probally doesn't have anywhere else to go. It's a ploy so she'll get what she wants.
Normally, I dont think the step-parents need to interfear with how the actcual parent wants to raise the child, but this is different. You need to confront your SD, and be there to support your wife. She's going to need you now more than ever.
Wish I had a magic wand for you...good luck!