Hi everybody. I am new to the group and looking for some advice. I feel like everyone my husband and I have tried to talk to doesnt understand us. I really think that until your a step parent you cant imagine what its like. I have two beautiful step children almost 7 and 5. They have lived with their father and me since september of 06' when their mom decided to give up physical placement to their father because her life plans were unattainable with two children in tow. As a result, the girls have a very close relationship to their father and myself. In the last two years I have had to play mom a lot while their mother remains absent for sometimes weeks at a time. As well as I helped support them for a year wile the mother chose not to pay child support. She has now decided to go for physcial placement and full custody of the kids. This is problematic because the oldest child wont even go with her mother for visits. Her therapist has agreed that she needs to be eazed into visitation and right now visits with her mom have so greatly upset her that she will be starting supervized visits for 2 hours a week. The oldest is close to me and we have a phenominal relationship. Her mother is very threatened by this. She has not liked me since highschool when her and my husband started dating (him and i were friends prior to their relationship) and now she allows her hatred for me to spill over and she makes no attempt to hide it from the children. She doesnt want me their when she picks the kids up or drops them off (despite the fact that this greatly upsets the kids) and she has tried to push me out of their life in every way possible even attempting to talk bad about me to the kids. She also makes me out to be the bad guy to the law guardian and therapist. I really dont understand why I am the bd guy when all I did was meet her childrens needs and raise them when she was too busy to do so. The law guardian thinks I am overinvolved because I care about the children and am there for anything that has anything to do with them (school meetings) etc. I dont understand what they want. I feel like it was ok for me to financially support them for a year as well as take care of them when she was too busy but that it is not okay for me to love them and have a relationship with them. Can anyone make sense of this? Or give me some advice on this situation? Does anyone else know what I am talking about?
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