most of you i have shared with here are still living with your partners/ husbands ,, my husbands habit is to run away each time s.a takes the upper hand. have lost count of the number of times he has left and returned when his s,a has been fulfilled. he has been gone from a few weeks to 4 months, the last time...things have ranged from running up thousands of pounds of debt on chat rooms , for which we had to file for joint bankruptcy, to visiting prostitutes, to having women ring my home telling me my husband loves them and i only have myself to blame as i obviously don't fulfill him.....well ., little do they know w have always had a regular, most nights sex life, any which way, and i am far from the ugliest women on the planet and for long stretches of our 10 year marriage i have supported him financially also as he hasn't worked because of his so called depression , which frees him up for his sexual activities while i'm at work all day working as a special needs teacher earning the living which keeps us and our son. he last came home 13 monthscago, after 4 months away getting his kicks,,, swore it would never happen again, went through counselling. and i really believed him...now he has gone again.. my question... why do i feel like dying again... why do i cry for him every night...why cant i stop loving him and find some hate instead and some self respect which will enable me to live a normal life again....read all your stories...what the fuck gave them the right to treat us in this way...to destroy our souls... please help me get strong enough to lead a life without him and to stop loving him ..
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